Omega Owners Forum
Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: JamesV6CDX on 15 February 2018, 03:14:18
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For those who don't know me, at an early age (maybe ten) I was taken in by, and lived with / was raised by my grandparents, who to all intents and purposes, fulfilled the role of parents up to my early 30s (I'm now Just 34).
My old man was a legend, he was successful in the Army in his younger days, and later became a very skilled engineer working on aircraft for what was then Dowty Rotol. His money always went into giving his family the best life possible, and one thing he always insisted on was maintaining and repairing his own cars, which, is where I think I must get my fascination from.
My grandma, who other than biologically undertook the role of a mother with me, became very unwell when I was about 16. She had numerous strokes, brittle diabetes, severe mobility problems, breathing difficulties, and began to need around the clock care. Being such a faithful rock, my old man (who was in brilliant health) religiously cared for her day in day out, and devoted his life to doing so. He even stopped having a social drink, and went tee total many years ago, because he wanted to be fresh / able to drive, should she require medical attention.
I have always thought he would outlive her by a long way, and envisaged taking him on holidays and giving him a really decent quality towards the later stages of his life.
In a twist of fate, in April 2014, at the age of 81, he was lugging about bags of compost and gravel, maintaining the garden, and suddenly sat down, saying he had pain in his head. He then slipped into "sleep" and an ambulance was called. A few hours later, in hospital, we were told that he'd had a catastrophic bleed on his brain, and had a matter of hours. I was with him, among other relatives, by his bedside as he slipped away, in timing with the sun going down, on the same day.
I was convinced the old lady would follow him, and be lost without him. But in true stubbornness, she bounced back over time, and adapted to living alone, with family and carers coming in to do (everything).
A couple of weeks ago, after stripping that Corsa engine, I flew to the Canaries for a holiday, with a real need to unwind. After my first night there, I had a phone call the next morning. She had died that morning, found slumped over the kitchen worktop in her wheelchair.
I've needed some time to process it all, and it's suddenly hitting me that I've lost my parents. Although she was unwell, she was mentally as sharp as a knife, "with it", in terms of today's society, and spent hours talking to me and guiding me.
I do still have my biological mum, but for reasons I don't want to go into, the relationship by nature consists of me providing the support and advice, not the other way around - and she'll also need more of that from me now they are gone.
To this end, other than my uncle, who is an absolute rock, and his wife and kids, I don't have any family left! :-\
Life sucks sometimes.
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My sincere condolences on your loss.No matter how much you may be expecting such things it still comes as a severe blow.But trust me the many fond and happy memories you have will endure.
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I am so very sorry for your loss, James. My deepest condolences. :'(
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Sorry to see this James. :'(
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Sorry for your loss James :(
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Sincere condolences James, I can’t imagine how hard this has been for you to process.
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My sincere condolences too James.
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Sorry for your loss James. :(
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Really sorry to hear this, James. My thoughts are with you.
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Again, sincere condolences to you James.
Take the time to process this properly. Occupational Health at work should have someone suitable to help you come to terms with this.
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Life isn't fair, James, I'm sure you are aware of that by now. Some people seem to get kicked in the gonads a lot more than others. I have no cliches or pearls of wisdom to deliver, only to say I'm very sad for all that has happened recently.
You will dwell on it and feel angry and upset for a while but, like all things, it will pass. God bless you, son.
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So very sorry for your loss.
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So saddened to read this, James :(
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Sorry for your loss James,Having fairly recently lost my Dad I have an inkling as to how you feel :'(
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Sorry for your loss James,Having fairly recently lost my Dad I have an inkling as to how you feel :'(
Sorry for your loss too, Henry :(
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my condolances to you.i know how you feel.i lost my mum in 2002,my faithfull dog in 2003 and my dad in 2004.you just have to go on and they will always be a part of your life and completely responsible for who you are now.
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No words from me can ever ease your pain, but I can at least share it with you. "Been there, done that", as they say. You ain't having things all your own way these days, are you? :'(
Ron.
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My sincere condolences James. We know such losses are going to happen, but they are still painful when they do. :'( :'( :'(
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Sorry for your loss James. You seem to have had the shitty end of the stick over the last year or so. Hope you bounce back from this and things look up for you soon. :y
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We all cope with grief and other major life traumas differently, some are able to just deal with it straight away, some need a few days to understand, and some will need weeks/months to come to terms with it.
Flipping things around, and trying to look for some good in what has happened, it sounds like they both managed a good innings, and both went with minimal suffering, which hopefully offers some comfort.
But you need to find your own path with dealing what has happened, seeking friends and professional assistance to suit.
Our thoughts are with you at this horrible time.
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Thanks for the kind words :)
I’ve never been one for professional assistance, but being surrounded by family and friends is very helpful :y
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Very sorry to hear of your sad loss. :'( :'(
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So sorry to hear this sad news James . . .thinking of you mate
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It speaks volumes about your noble character, James: with all of your personal woes and still not recovered from your accident, you still offer to help people on here - and elsewhere, no doubt.
Truly a Saint amongst men. :y 8)
Ron.
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I think I'm going to be sick 🤮
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I think I'm going to be sick 🤮
Me too. I’m in the pub and had too much peroni ::)
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I think I'm going to be sick 🤮
Me too. I’m in the pub and had too much peroni ::)
Gnats piss, get a couple of Tennants Superbrew down yer neck. ;D