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Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: Field Marshal Dr. Opti on 17 November 2021, 18:23:01

Title: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Field Marshal Dr. Opti on 17 November 2021, 18:23:01
Just returned from hospital following an endoscopy.

I had one previously in 2007.

They give you a choice between sedation or just throat spray. As sedation is for old people and nancy boys  I took the throat spray, and was able to watch the whole 'gullet fest' live on a TV monitor.

Great fun. ::)

Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Sir Tigger KC on 17 November 2021, 18:35:13
I had one up the other end a few months ago and had gas rather than sedation (which is for sissies) so I could drive home after.  :y

Hope the results bring good news M'Lud.  :)
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Field Marshal Dr. Opti on 17 November 2021, 18:46:24
I had one up the other end a few months ago and had gas rather than sedation (which is for sissies) so I could drive home after.  :y

Hope the results bring good news M'Lud.  :)

Thanks, Tig.

For some reason I'm losing blood.

Nothing external is evident so they think I may have an internal bleed. They suggested (possible) tumours, ulcers, hernia, or even stomach cancer which is not unknown in my family.

Fortunately everything is fine and clean as a virgin's honeypot. :y

Next they will stick a tube up my arse and push it through the 'pipework' up there. ;)
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: dave the builder on 17 November 2021, 19:02:17
I hope this camera gets washed between uses  :D

best get some garlic and crucifixes ordered in case it's vampires  :o

hope they get to the BOTTOM of it ,and when they do ,they use lube  :D
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Field Marshal Dr. Opti on 17 November 2021, 19:08:59
I hope this camera gets washed between uses  :D

best get some garlic and crucifixes ordered in case it's vampires  :o

hope they get to the BOTTOM of it ,and when they do ,they use lube  :D




https://youtu.be/kBjjv94QCIM (https://youtu.be/kBjjv94QCIM)

It's not a nice experience.  Going by the comments some people just can't hack it. :-X

It feels very alien to have something  black, hard, and 30 inches long, being forced down your throat. ;D
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: BazaJT on 17 November 2021, 19:17:05
Could it be the ground glass Lady Opti is feeding you in your dinner? :D ;D
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: redelitev6 on 17 November 2021, 19:21:13
   :(   Had an endoscopy a few years ago , given the choice again I would be knocked out with as many drugs as possible , it was horrendous , I'm sure the lady doing it moonlighted for Dyno rod  :(
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Field Marshal Dr. Opti on 17 November 2021, 19:30:17
Could it be the ground glass Lady Opti is feeding you in your dinner? :D ;D

I wouldn't put it past her, Baza.

There is a 'bunny boiler' element to be personality. ::) ::)
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: LC0112G on 17 November 2021, 19:30:29
It feels very alien to have something  black, hard, and 30 inches long, being forced down your throat. ;D

Whereas having something black, hard, and 30 inches long, being forced up your jacksie is something you're familiar with? (as in not alien to you?) ???
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Field Marshal Dr. Opti on 17 November 2021, 19:34:11
   :(   Had an endoscopy a few years ago , given the choice again I would be knocked out with as many drugs as possible , it was horrendous , I'm sure the lady doing it moonlighted for Dyno rod :(

Now that is witty.... ;D ;D ;D

The tube 'feels' the size of a drainpipe though. He then took a couple of bites out of my stomach  for the purpose of biopsy.

Really weird because I could see it on the screen and feel it at the same time.
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Field Marshal Dr. Opti on 17 November 2021, 19:37:15
It feels very alien to have something  black, hard, and 30 inches long, being forced down your throat. ;D

Whereas having something black, hard, and 30 inches long, being forced up your jacksie is something you're familiar with? (as in not alien to you?) ???

My arse is strictly 'exit only' so it will be a new experience. :)

I hope it doesn't turn me queer.... ;) :D
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: ronnyd on 17 November 2021, 20:15:08
I had one up the other end a few months ago and had gas rather than sedation (which is for sissies) so I could drive home after.  :y

Hope the results bring good news M'Lud.  :)
Hope you avoided all the potholes Tig.  :o
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Raeturbo on 17 November 2021, 20:16:47
Hope everything is ok mate👍
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: YZ250 on 17 November 2021, 20:30:04
Hope all is good.  :y

I've had the camera up the Japs eye as well. Quite strange watching the doctors head getting that close without a happy ending.  ;D  They've heard all of the "While you're down there" quips so don't bother with that.  ::)
I piss, shit and cough up blood, have done for years. Don't get me wrong, I'm not overly bothered ..... yet, and I wouldn't have even bothered going to the doctors/hospital to have it checked, but my crane licence medical had to be done every three years so the checks were a necessary requirement.
The check up itself was painless (gel on the end of it to numb it) but the flames when I pissed after the check up were a different matter.  :o
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: STEMO on 17 November 2021, 20:46:23
Weird, weird medical tests. I had to be injected with yellow dye so the doctor could see what was going on in my left eye (wet amd) and my piss was a sight to behold. I'm pretty sure it would have glowed in the dark. ;D
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: STEMO on 17 November 2021, 20:49:29
Just returned from hospital following an endoscopy.

I had one previously in 2007.

They give you a choice between sedation or just throat spray. As sedation is for old people and nancy boys  I took the throat spray, and was able to watch the whole 'gullet fest' live on a TV monitor.

Great fun. ::)
I would ask for a general anaesthetic and an overnight stay  ;D
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Doctor Gollum on 17 November 2021, 20:58:20
Weird, weird medical tests. I had to be injected with yellow dye so the doctor could see what was going on in my left eye (wet amd) and my piss was a sight to behold. I'm pretty sure it would have glowed in the dark. ;D
"Sorry dear, I have just soiled myself."
"I'll turn on the light."
"No need, I can see where it's gone"
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Field Marshal Dr. Opti on 18 November 2021, 13:11:14
Hope all is good.  :y

I've had the camera up the Japs eye as well. Quite strange watching the doctors head getting that close without a happy ending.  ;D  They've heard all of the "While you're down there" quips so don't bother with that.  ::)
I piss, shit and cough up blood, have done for years. Don't get me wrong, I'm not overly bothered ..... yet, and I wouldn't have even bothered going to the doctors/hospital to have it checked, but my crane licence medical had to be done every three years so the checks were a necessary requirement.
The check up itself was painless (gel on the end of it to numb it) but the flames when I pissed after the check up were a different matter.  :o

Never had the dubious pleasure of a probe shoved up the old 'Jap eye' :y

However, I have experienced a gloved finger up my arse to check my prostate.......at least I assume it was his finger, he was standing behind me so I suppose it could have been something else. :-X :-\
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Sir Tigger KC on 18 November 2021, 14:02:59
I've been told that when young lads find themselves in the clap clinic, it's not unknown for Drs to be less than gentle with the cotton bud in the japs eye to teach them a lesson.  :(                                                 ;D
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Field Marshal Dr. Opti on 18 November 2021, 14:31:22
I've been told that when young lads find themselves in the clap clinic, it's not unknown for Drs to be less than gentle with the cotton bud in the japs eye to teach them a lesson.  :(                                                 ;D

I must admit that I had reason to visit the clap clinic more than once back in the day. :-X

The staff could be a bit rough with an element of 'finger wagging'. :D ;D
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Migv6 le Frog Fan on 18 November 2021, 14:58:20
Hope all is good.  :y

I've had the camera up the Japs eye as well. Quite strange watching the doctors head getting that close without a happy ending.  ;D  They've heard all of the "While you're down there" quips so don't bother with that.  ::)
I piss, shit and cough up blood, have done for years. Don't get me wrong, I'm not overly bothered ..... yet, and I wouldn't have even bothered going to the doctors/hospital to have it checked, but my crane licence medical had to be done every three years so the checks were a necessary requirement.
The check up itself was painless (gel on the end of it to numb it) but the flames when I pissed after the check up were a different matter.  :o

Never had the dubious pleasure of a probe shoved up the old 'Jap eye' :y

However, I have experienced a gloved finger up my arse to check my prostate.......at least I assume it was his finger, he was standing behind me so I suppose it could have been something else. :-X :-\

Same here. Could have been a finger, could have been a pedal bin.I have no sense of perspective down there.  :)
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Field Marshal Dr. Opti on 18 November 2021, 15:03:54
Hope all is good.  :y

I've had the camera up the Japs eye as well. Quite strange watching the doctors head getting that close without a happy ending.  ;D  They've heard all of the "While you're down there" quips so don't bother with that.  ::)
I piss, shit and cough up blood, have done for years. Don't get me wrong, I'm not overly bothered ..... yet, and I wouldn't have even bothered going to the doctors/hospital to have it checked, but my crane licence medical had to be done every three years so the checks were a necessary requirement.
The check up itself was painless (gel on the end of it to numb it) but the flames when I pissed after the check up were a different matter.  :o

Never had the dubious pleasure of a probe shoved up the old 'Jap eye' :y

However, I have experienced a gloved finger up my arse to check my prostate.......at least I assume it was his finger, he was standing behind me so I suppose it could have been something else. :-X :-\

Same here. Could have been a finger, could have been a pedal bin.I have no sense of perspective down there.  :)

I didn't think of this option. ::) ::) ::) ;)
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Sir Tigger KC on 18 November 2021, 16:11:10
I've been told that when young lads find themselves in the clap clinic, it's not unknown for Drs to be less than gentle with the cotton bud in the japs eye to teach them a lesson.  :(                                                 ;D

I must admit that I had reason to visit the clap clinic more than once back in the day. :-X

The staff could be a bit rough with an element of 'finger wagging'. :D ;D

How was the cotton bud?  ;D
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Raeturbo on 18 November 2021, 16:13:11
Ahh he’s gone...... but not for cotton👀👀
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: STEMO on 18 November 2021, 16:14:10
Ahh he’s gone...... but not for cotton👀👀
One of Bernards, if I remember correctly.
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Raeturbo on 18 November 2021, 16:19:02
👍😂
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Raeturbo on 19 November 2021, 15:07:50
Back to the nature of the thread... looks like Biden overdone it with Camilla... he’s in for a colonoscopy he’s temporarily handed the keys over to Kamala👀
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Field Marshal Dr. Opti on 19 November 2021, 15:10:49
Back to the nature of the thread... looks like Biden overdone it with Camilla... he’s in for a colonoscopy he’s temporarily handed the keys over to Kamala👀

To quote Kevin Wood.

"What can possibly go wrong" :)
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Field Marshal Dr. Opti on 19 November 2021, 15:12:19
Back to the nature of the thread... looks like Biden overdone it with Camilla... he’s in for a colonoscopy he’s temporarily handed the keys over to Kamala👀

I imagine he'll sleep through it, much like COP 26. :)
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Raeturbo on 19 November 2021, 15:14:40
 ;D
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Doctor Gollum on 19 November 2021, 15:15:15
Presumably they're looking for his brain or the hand that controls him.
Title: Re: Opti is gagging for it....literally.
Post by: Raeturbo on 19 November 2021, 15:17:19
Ahh.. “the hand” :D