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Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: eliteomegaman on 03 June 2010, 14:57:42

Title: Just for you Peachy - hope you like them??!!
Post by: eliteomegaman on 03 June 2010, 14:57:42
The Dirtiest Clean Welsh Sheep Joke!

A farmer was out on his Welsh hillside tending his flock one day, when he saw a man drinking with a cupped hand from the stream which ran down from one of his fields. Realising the danger, he shouted over to the man, 'Paid a yfed y dwr! Mae'n ych-y-fi!' [Don't drink the water.  It's disgusting!]

The man at the stream lifted his head and put a cupped hand to his ear, shrugged his shoulders at the farmer, and carried on drinking.

Realising the man at the stream couldn't hear him, the farmer moved closer, 'Paid a yfed! Dwr ych-y-fi! Defaid yn cachu yn y dwr!' [Don't drink.  Water's disgusting.  Sheep poo in the water.]

Still the walker couldn't hear the farmer. Finally the farmer walked right up to the man at the stream and once again said again, 'Dwr yn ych-y-fi! Paid a'i yfed!'. [Water's disgusting.  Don't drink it!]

'I'm dreadfully sorry my good man, I can't understand a word you say dear boy!  Can't you speak English?' said the man at the stream, in a splendid English accent.

'Oh I see', said the farmer, 'I was just saying, if you use both hands you can get more in........ !

Welsh Lamb?
 
Mrs Hopkins ordered a shoulder of Welsh lamb from her butcher, Mr Davies. She suspected that the meat she had been given was not the genuine article.

'Are you certain this is real Welsh lamb?' Mrs Hopkins demanded, angrily.

'Ah, well, Mrs Hopkins,' confessed Mr Davies, the butcher. 'Look you, that lamb was actually born in New Zealand but I can assure you that it had Welsh parents.'


Three Englishmen and a Welshman

Three Englishman walk into a bar and spot a Welshman sitting alone at a table.

One fellow said to the others, 'Let's pick a fight with that Welshman over there.'
His partner replied, 'Wait, we don't want to be arrested. Let's make him start the fight.'
The third Englishman said, 'Wait here chaps. I know how to do it.'

He went over to the Welshman and said, 'St David was a flippin' sissy.'
To this the Welshman replied, 'Ah well you don't say!' and calmly resumed drinking his beer.

The second Englishman now tried his luck and said to the Welshman, 'St David was a stupid fool that wore a dress!'
The Welshman again replied, 'You're very sharp, you don't say!' and calmly resumed drinking his beer.

The last Englishman told his friends he knew how to rile the Welshman and bounced up to the table and yelled, 'St David was an Englishman!'

The Welshman replied, calmly, 'That's what your mates were trying to tell me.'   ;D ;D ;D

Title: Re: Just for you Peachy - hope you like them??!!
Post by: Sixstring on 03 June 2010, 15:02:25
I'm impressed with the welsh language.........did you have to type it out carefully?

good joke though.............!!
Title: Re: Just for you Peachy - hope you like them??!!
Post by: Peachy on 03 June 2010, 15:03:21
Are these not racist.
I could be offended, I am NOT, but I could be, maybe the next welsh person will be.
Admins goona catch you.
 :D :D :D :D :D
Title: Re: Just for you Peachy - hope you like them??!!
Post by: Marks DTM Calib on 03 June 2010, 15:06:06
Lol, I think they are well enough balanced at both targeted parties to be acceptable.
Title: Re: Just for you Peachy - hope you like them??!!
Post by: CaptainZok on 03 June 2010, 15:10:13
I think he's done very well getting a welshman and a sheep into the same joke without mentioning wellington boots once.
Title: Re: Just for you Peachy - hope you like them??!!
Post by: eliteomegaman on 03 June 2010, 15:22:25
Hahaha nice one CaptainZok!!  :y

ps. got my miggy working - it was the bloody dis pack!!
Title: Re: Just for you Peachy - hope you like them??!!
Post by: Turk on 03 June 2010, 20:39:02
Quote
Are these not racist.
I could be offended, I am NOT, but I could be, maybe the next welsh person will be.
Admins goona catch you.
 :D :D :D :D :D
Nah, give 'em a break. Imagine having to go through life as a Sais !!  :o :o :o        ;)