Omega Owners Forum

Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: jerry on 12 September 2010, 22:40:51

Title: are you giving 100% at work?
Post by: jerry on 12 September 2010, 22:40:51
In these hard times how often do you hear about giving 100% at work-or even 110%!Well, someone sent me a ready reckoner.See how you fair guys/girls.Just what does it mean to give more than 100%?Here is a simple mathematical formula to see how you contribute to your workplace:

First take the alphabet and allocate each letter a number so that A=1,B=2,C=3 and so on until Z=26.
Now then,for example, HARDWORK becomes 8 plus 1plus18plus4plus23plus15plus18plus11=98%
and KNOWLEDGE=96% but ATTITUDE=100%. So you see, the right attitude really is the most important thing .As for all those managers who claim to put in more than 100% and demand the same from you, just consider that BULLSH*T=103% and ASSKISSING=118%. And so, with mathematical certainty you can conclude that whilst hardwork and knowledge will get you close and attitude will get you there , it really is bullsh*t and asskissing that will impress your boss most and put you over the top :y
Title: Re: are you giving 100% at work?
Post by: Dishevelled Den on 12 September 2010, 23:27:23
Have I seen you in the lofty corridors of Marsham Street Jerry? ;D ;D :y
Title: Re: are you giving 100% at work?
Post by: jerry on 12 September 2010, 23:31:36
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Have I seen you in the lofty corridors of Marsham Street Jerry? ;D ;D :y

you might think that Z, I couldnt possibly comment ;D ;D
Title: Re: are you giving 100% at work?
Post by: Amigo on 13 September 2010, 00:14:27
Interesting idea but as with work my attention span just expir.........  ..   ....... :D
                                       
Title: Re: are you giving 100% at work?
Post by: PhilRich on 13 September 2010, 16:06:02
I consistently gave 100% but could never manage anything more :(
But then again, I was only the Boss! ;D ;)
Title: Re: are you giving 100% at work?
Post by: Mysteryman on 13 September 2010, 16:27:44
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I consistently gave 100% but could never manage anything more :(
But then again, I was only the Boss! ;D ;)before the company went bust because I was useless


Very candid Phil :-?
Title: Re: are you giving 100% at work?
Post by: PhilRich on 13 September 2010, 16:36:06
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Quote
I consistently gave 100% but could never manage anything more :(
But then again, I was only the Boss! ;D ;)before the company went bust because I was useless



Very candid Phil :-?







Ho Ho Bloody Ho! ;D ;D ;)


Title: Re: are you giving 100% at work?
Post by: Richie London on 13 September 2010, 18:09:59
my days of giving 100% are dead. never worked for anyone who gives 100% back to there staff, even had 2 blokes i've worked for TRY! to knock me for money. thats what its like working for mickey mouse outfits in the building game.
Title: Re: are you giving 100% at work?
Post by: MikeDundee on 13 September 2010, 18:38:13
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In these hard times how often do you hear about giving 100% at work-or even 110%!Well, someone sent me a ready reckoner.See how you fair guys/girls.Just what does it mean to give more than 100%?Here is a simple mathematical formula to see how you contribute to your workplace:

First take the alphabet and allocate each letter a number so that A=1,B=2,C=3 and so on until Z=26.
Now then,for example, HARDWORK becomes 8 plus 1plus18plus4plus23plus15plus18plus11=98%
and KNOWLEDGE=96% but ATTITUDE=100%. So you see, the right attitude really is the most important thing .As for all those managers who claim to put in more than 100% and demand the same from you, just consider that BULLSH*T=103% and ASSKISSING=118%. And so, with mathematical certainty you can conclude that whilst hardwork and knowledge will get you close and attitude will get you there , it really is bullsh*t and asskissing that will impress your boss most and put you over the top :y

Interesting formula :y, but at the end of the day most managers will not use such a formula to guage whether staff are putting in 100% or more, my formula - common sense approach, asskick when work not done or crap work done, Oh and a pint a day keeps the stress away.

However, there's always rules to be adhered too with any employer whether manager or not
Title: Re: are you giving 100% at work?
Post by: shane1000 on 13 September 2010, 20:00:36
i'm a prison officer and first thing tommorrow im going along to my manager with this new information ... will let you know if i can go home tommorrow night or will be kept in !! :D :D :D
Title: Re: are you giving 100% at work?
Post by: Webby the Bear on 13 September 2010, 21:33:45
the only thing i give 100% to is my omega, drinking beer and w*nking (whilst at work) :y
Title: Re: are you giving 100% at work?
Post by: Webby the Bear on 13 September 2010, 21:34:14
zulu, what is that on your cat's head? lol
Title: Re: are you giving 100% at work?
Post by: Dishevelled Den on 13 September 2010, 21:39:34
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zulu, what is that on your cat's head? lol

A rice bowl Webby 8-) ;D :y
Title: Re: are you giving 100% at work?
Post by: Webby the Bear on 13 September 2010, 21:40:20
hahaha love it ;)

is that your cat?
Title: Re: are you giving 100% at work?
Post by: Dishevelled Den on 13 September 2010, 21:42:21
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hahaha love it ;)

is that your cat?


No W, if I tried to do that to any of mine they would have me in shreds. ;D :y
Title: Re: are you giving 100% at work?
Post by: Webby the Bear on 13 September 2010, 21:44:42
hahaha i got bad eyesight and i thought it was a cat with that electric chair head cap thing hahaha :o :y
Title: Re: are you giving 100% at work?
Post by: Dishevelled Den on 13 September 2010, 21:48:54
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hahaha i got bad eyesight and i thought it was a cat with that electric chair head cap thing hahaha :o :y

You've watched the Green Mile too many times W ;D ;D :y