Omega Owners Forum
Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: Marie on 03 March 2008, 19:18:06
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well the day is drawering closer my hubby is havin a major opp on both his legs on friday afternoon.
Basically they are going to slice down the front of both shins peal the skin back then carve into his muscle several times( well its more times then that) then stitch the skin back together.
They want him walkin on saturday if all goes to plan, if not ill be putting a wheel chair in the boot of the omega.
(he has been waiting for this opp now for 3years, which is stupid and hes in the RN so its pussers fault.)
he then goes for 3 week intense rehab on the 26th.
see the thing is i know he is worried about it as i am i but i am putting on a brave face for him. dont want to let him know i am really worried as it will make him worse.
i cant talk to him about how i am feeling for this reason so i thought talking to you guys might help me. and he dont look on OOF so i know he wont find out.
Just hope i can cope while hes gone what with a pain in the arse for a son(hes 3 and driving me up the wall), half a ton of study and several exams and to top it off the royal navy are not helpin with my out of hour duties while i am gone they want me to pay the extra childcare fees so i can do soddin duties which at this present in time are the least of my worries.
sorry had to spill to someone.
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Hey Marie. Sod work, your family allways comes first.
Work will take a back seat or at least it should & they should understand.
That's what i live by.
You can't juggle to many things, because you'll drop one.
We're here to listen though & hopefully help.
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Hey Marie. Sod work, your family allways comes first.
Work will take a back seat or at least it should & they should understand.
That's what i live by.
You can't juggle to many things, because you'll drop one.
We're here to listen though & hopefully help.
cheers i will self distruct before i drop one of them, my divsional officer (boss type person) does not give a sh*t keeps telling me "its life in a blue suit" i have been so close to leaning over his desk and headbutting him but its not worth a stint in colchester for.
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A worrying time. At least its finally happening now though. Hopefully, by Sat, all the worrying will be over :)
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Hey Marie. Sod work, your family allways comes first.
Work will take a back seat or at least it should & they should understand.
That's what i live by.
You can't juggle to many things, because you'll drop one.
We're here to listen though & hopefully help.
cheers i will self distruct before i drop one of them, my divsional officer (boss type person) does not give a sh*t keeps telling me "its life in a blue suit" i have been so close to leaning over his desk and headbutting him but its not worth a stint in colchester for.
It's just a job, not a life. Your families the most important thing you'll ever have. It's a shame some don't realize this.
Personally i hate people that put work before family >:(
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Prioritise.
1)Look after yourself first. You can't help your son or hubby if you are
not ok within yourself.
2)Your son is the next priority. He can't look after himself. Be there
for him. Ref the childcare fees, have you not got a good friend that
look after him, perhaps along with their own child, for when you
on duty?
3)Next is hubby. The medical staff will be looking after the physical
bits. You look after the mental side of stuff with plenty of support
and looking after the rest of the stuff in your lives, so that he
concentrate on getting better without any distractions.
4)Exams and studying can take a back seat for the 3 week
recuperation period. You've got the rest of your life to attack
them. When you are in a better frame of mind with no distractions.
You'll be ok. Just take everything one day at a time and deal with
problems as and when they arise.
Remember to look after yourself first. You'll be no use to anyone if you
don't. :y
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Prioritise.
1)Look after yourself first. You can't help your son or hubby if you are
not ok within yourself.
2)Your son is the next priority. He can't look after himself. Be there
for him. Ref the childcare fees, have you not got a good friend that
look after him, perhaps along with their own child, for when you
on duty?
3)Next is hubby. The medical staff will be looking after the physical
bits. You look after the mental side of stuff with plenty of support
and looking after the rest of the stuff in your lives, so that he
concentrate on getting better without any distractions.
4)Exams and studying can take a back seat for the 3 week
recuperation period. You've got the rest of your life to attack
them. When you are in a better frame of mind with no distractions.
You'll be ok. Just take everything one day at a time and deal with
problems as and when they arise.
Remember to look after yourself first. You'll be no use to anyone if you
don't. :y
Yep. Wise words :y :y :y :y
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Prioritise.
1)Look after yourself first. You can't help your son or hubby if you are
not ok within yourself.
2)Your son is the next priority. He can't look after himself. Be there
for him. Ref the childcare fees, have you not got a good friend that
look after him, perhaps along with their own child, for when you
on duty?
3)Next is hubby. The medical staff will be looking after the physical
bits. You look after the mental side of stuff with plenty of support
and looking after the rest of the stuff in your lives, so that he
concentrate on getting better without any distractions.
4)Exams and studying can take a back seat for the 3 week
recuperation period. You've got the rest of your life to attack
them. When you are in a better frame of mind with no distractions.
You'll be ok. Just take everything one day at a time and deal with
problems as and when they arise.
Remember to look after yourself first. You'll be no use to anyone if you
don't. :y
Could'nt agree more :y, hope everything works out fine ;)
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Prioritise.
1)Look after yourself first. You can't help your son or hubby if you are
not ok within yourself.
2)Your son is the next priority. He can't look after himself. Be there
for him. Ref the childcare fees, have you not got a good friend that
look after him, perhaps along with their own child, for when you
on duty?
3)Next is hubby. The medical staff will be looking after the physical
bits. You look after the mental side of stuff with plenty of support
and looking after the rest of the stuff in your lives, so that he
concentrate on getting better without any distractions.
4)Exams and studying can take a back seat for the 3 week
recuperation period. You've got the rest of your life to attack
them. When you are in a better frame of mind with no distractions.
You'll be ok. Just take everything one day at a time and deal with
problems as and when they arise.
Remember to look after yourself first. You'll be no use to anyone if you
don't. :y
Wise words.
Talking helps to relieve the burden of worry, and sometimes you want to talk to loved ones but if they are part of that worry then you feel isolated.
try and talk to him about his worries, if he can open up and talk you will find it easier to talk about your own concerns, there's nothing to say that he isn't worrying about you worrying about him and your son and work etc.
good luck, and remember you can always post stuff up here, it's like writing a letter and sometimes that's a good release
:y
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1/Work to Live, NOT, Live to Work.
2/ Family are paramount, there is NOTHING MORE IMPORTANT (End Of):y
I had a big bust up with my boss before Christmas, told it to him like it was! 45 mins later got a phone call, an apology and lots more respect ever since... Cleared the air considerably...
"Will be thinking of Hubby on Friday, all WILL go well..."
Keep your pretty face smiling, you don't want crows feet now do you ;)
Dave C
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I do hope it all goes well for him. As others have said, your welfare and that of your family comes before work. It's not a disaster if that has to be put on the back burner while you get through this.
Kevin
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And the MOD wonder why recruitment figures are falling, your d.o is a
tosser i thought they were meant to help, after all if you aren't happy your work is going to suffer.Good luck to your fella tho :y
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Cheers fellas i just wish the ar*e hole at work thought more like you guys. i get the fealing he dont like me! or is it because i am a women in the royal navy we do get that sometimes. just want to give him a peace of my mind but i cant not without concequences anyway.
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Cheers fellas i just wish the ar*e hole at work thought more like you guys. i get the fealing he dont like me! or is it because i am a women in the royal navy we do get that sometimes. just want to give him a peace of my mind but i cant not without concequences anyway.
Diplomatically, level terms.... shouldn't be offended, if so, well! as you say t0553r!
I work with a few women, they are women in a mans world... not saying that you are, these women are.. I make a point of being there for them, at certain times they are very sensitive and sobby, that's OK, other times they are bossy, that's OK too.. they are vey good friends indeed, always at the end of the phone for each other... ended up helping to drain a tank of diesel / petrol mixture from one of their husbands company cars yesterday... that's what friends are for....
One big Happy Family
Keep smiling, you've got us!
DC 8-)
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And i am greatfull for that.
sod them at least i know i can log on and chat to someone on here.
there is nothing really work can do to me, they are not going to shave my head and sand me to afgan. :)
cheers guys.
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is there someone further up the chain you could approach with out it looking like your telling tales or a families officer, may be
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is there someone further up the chain you could approach with out it looking like your telling tales or a families officer, may be
looks like someone knows the system........
dont worrie all i will do is mention it yet again to my divsional officer and then if my grades start t fail or i end up having snags of any type i will make my way to the bish, he will not patronise or belittle me and he has more power then anybody in my section. there is also a chief petty officer that i get on really well with that i can go to aswell. the only snag is i cant do ether of the above until my divisional officer f**ks up! have to use the chain of command much as i dont want to cos if i dont i get in the s**t.
royal Navy employes ssome right nobs
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I work with a few women, they are women in a mans world... not saying that you are, these women are.. I make a point of being there for them, at certain times they are very sensitive and sobby, that's OK, other times they are bossy, that's OK too.. they are vey good friends indeed, always at the end of the phone for each other... ended up helping to drain a tank of diesel / petrol mixture from one of their husbands company cars yesterday... that's what friends are for....
One big Happy Family
Keep smiling, you've got us!
DC 8-)
When I used to work for your company it was similar :)
Unfortunately, the American firm I work for seems to actively prevent such comradeship >:(
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Prioritise.
1)Look after yourself first. You can't help your son or hubby if you are
not ok within yourself.
2)Your son is the next priority. He can't look after himself. Be there
for him. Ref the childcare fees, have you not got a good friend that
look after him, perhaps along with their own child, for when you
on duty?
3)Next is hubby. The medical staff will be looking after the physical
bits. You look after the mental side of stuff with plenty of support
and looking after the rest of the stuff in your lives, so that he
concentrate on getting better without any distractions.
4)Exams and studying can take a back seat for the 3 week
recuperation period. You've got the rest of your life to attack
them. When you are in a better frame of mind with no distractions.
You'll be ok. Just take everything one day at a time and deal with
problems as and when they arise.
Remember to look after yourself first. You'll be no use to anyone if you
don't. :y
Cant say better..
Think positive, everything will go ok :y
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You are on a training course .. speak to the Chief Instructor ... the system will not want you to fail the course due to exterior problems.. looks bad on the Instructors. You can always do this on the QT.. informally to start ... get formal if they don't help ... :)
If you don't want to upset the staff directly .. have they appointed a Course Leader ?? If so speak to him/her.
Another option might be the Admin PO/CPO ?? They are usually experienced and may be able to "suggest" to the DO that a litle flex might be the order of the day.
Good luck any way .. :)
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is there someone further up the chain you could approach with out it looking like your telling tales or a families officer, may be
looks like someone knows the system........
dont worrie all i will do is mention it yet again to my divsional officer and then if my grades start t fail or i end up having snags of any type i will make my way to the bish, he will not patronise or belittle me and he has more power then anybody in my section. there is also a chief petty officer that i get on really well with that i can go to aswell. the only snag is i cant do ether of the above until my divisional officer f**ks up! have to use the chain of command much as i dont want to cos if i dont i get in the s**t.
royal Navy employes ssome right nobs
Along the lines of Zippo, don't you have access to a welfare/ families officer, Sure the Navy has them, the Army do and they can help out in time of difficulty, i have had some contact with Army through work.
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my thoughts are with you and your hubby, I'm sure all will go well :y
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when i was younger i made the mistake of putting job before family ,i will always regret it so can only say in the short term at least ,try to put hubby/son top of priority list,but its easier said than done sometimes,i dont envy working wives and mothers one bit.if you do end up in colchester i,ll come and bring you a cake with a file in it. :y
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Be strong and hope it all pans out for you.
Good luck to your hubby i'm sure it will all work out good for all of you.
:y :y
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Family come first!!
Good luck to both of you.
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Marie, I hope things are working out for you but if you really get bogged down and someone's turned out that light at the end of the tunnel pm me. My son is a RN lieutenant, based in Portsmouth at the moment - he may be able to pull some strings where they may need pulling. If he can he would and he likes bucking the system - he's my son afterall lol Anyway let me know
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Hope all goes well, i'm sure he will come through it with flying colours, and just remember, you only get one life and one family but there are lots of jobs out there, so look after you and yours and worry about work when everyone is on the mend. Fingers crossed for a speedy recovery for hubby :y
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HI Marie
Just to say that i hope all goes well with the opp on your husband i,m sure it will be fine. Just make sure that you look after yourself eg eat right and get rest as this can make a big diff as to how you can deal with times like this. I also find that a good 30 min walk helps me to clear my head and get things in order.
All the very best
Steve, :) :)
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'Crossed fingers' all goes well,also wish your hubby a speedy recovery :)
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Unfortunately Marie, this is getting to be typical of our National forces not to look after their own people when in need of support. As others have said it's ONLY a job - your priorities are YOU and your FAMILY.
I hope it all goes well with hubby's op and wish him a speedy recovery.
I know it's easier said than done but try not to stress out too much and as you well know, you'll get plenty of support on here. :y
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Its always worse/just as bad for the family when something major happens. A drunk driver (w****r) knocked me of my Mbike a few years ago on the M27, my wife and family went to hell and back waiting for me to wake up in ICU. Advice would be stay positive and keep smiling (very difficult) As ex-RN I can sympathize with work problems and 'life in a blue suit' jibe crap, they really don't give a shit as long as the numbers add up! Have you tried RN family services for help? Good luck to you and hubby, chin up things will be fine ::) :y
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i will go to family services as a last resort as i have had bad experiances with them. :(
(once they told me i couldnt go on compasionate leave cos my mothers heart attack was not life threatening) :-/ really.....
the bish will be my first port of call i thinks i might go see him this week if the timetable allows it. at least if nothing happens ill get a few brew out of him. :)
Cheers guys you have made me feel better only thing is reading back over i sound like i am moaning and worring about triveral things. must just be me i thinks.
my best mate nicki keeps telling me off for not lookin after no1. says i need to go and have a blow out, sounds great but im not really one for the mornin after hangover. Hate feeling lilke sh*t.
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i will go to family services as a last resort as i have had bad experiances with them. :(
(once they told me i couldnt go on compasionate leave cos my mothers heart attack was not life threatening) :-/ really.....
the bish will be my first port of call i thinks i might go see him this week if the timetable allows it. at least if nothing happens ill get a few brew out of him. :)
Cheers guys you have made me feel better only thing is reading back over i sound like i am moaning and worring about triveral things. must just be me i thinks.
my best mate nicki keeps telling me off for not lookin after no1. says i need to go and have a blow out, sounds great but im not really one for the mornin after hangover. Hate feeling lilke sh*t.
I wont pass comment ;D
A good blow out never hurt anybody and its good to get out with your mates for a good evening out!
The key thing is to concentrate on the good things that follow these short term problems.
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cheers ;D ;D so i am dripping (moaning).
i like your thinking it is just a short blip (prob) and will pass by quicker then a quick thing.
and after i will wonder WTF i was worrying about!
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cheers ;D ;D so i am dripping (moaning).
i like your thinking it is just a short blip (prob) and will pass by quicker then a quick thing.
and after i will wonder WTF i was worrying about!
We all do it from time to time Marie ::)
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i will go to family services as a last resort as i have had bad experiances with them. :(
(once they told me i couldnt go on compasionate leave cos my mothers heart attack was not life threatening) :-/ really.....
the bish will be my first port of call i thinks i might go see him this week if the timetable allows it. at least if nothing happens ill get a few brew out of him. :)
Cheers guys you have made me feel better only thing is reading back over i sound like i am moaning and worring about triveral things. must just be me i thinks.
my best mate nicki keeps telling me off for not lookin after no1. says i need to go and have a blow out, sounds great but im not really one for the mornin after hangover. Hate feeling lilke sh*t.
Yeah going to the bish is a good Idea- Depends who your first point of contact happens to be with family services, some are very good , some totally indifferent and others nosey busy bodies who want your life story. ;D And don't worry about whining, If you are worried then sharing it does help me thinks eh? :y