How do the axle stands and jack work on jump starting a mig then. 
Because the f*cking machine has locked me out and the only way to get in is to connect a battery to the alternator/starter to provide enough power to open the door to allow me to open the bonnet, turn the ignition on and jump start it in the normal way.
If you have a better suggestion, suggest it now, please.

Unlock the boot, shove the arm rest down, flick the back seat down and crawl through. Best you unlock the boot and then get one of your neighbers kids to do the rest.
Have you got a tow bar fitted, if so does it have the second socket, if it has I do believe one of the pins should be live, that will give a connection for enough power to open the doors.
Boot won't unlock in this state. The late (and for me unlamented)
Killerwatt took me to task for this and accused me of neglecting the lock maintenance, but it's nothing to do with that. It's physically impossible to turn the key when this happens. I could supply power through the boot light if I could open the lid, as I don't have a towing hook.
