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[eliteomegaman]

The Penis requests a promotion and a raise for the following reasons:

--has to work hard;

--has to work at great depths

--has to work upside down

--has no ventilation or air-conditioned environment at work

--has to work in a high humidity environment

--has to work at high temperatures

--does not get weekends and holidays off

--does not get time off after extra hours of work

--has a hazardous work environment that often causes illness.

Request denied for the following reasons:

 - does not work 8 hours in a row

 - does not answer immediately to all requests

 - after a short activity period, falls asleep at work

 - shows no fidelity to the workplace

 - retires too early

 - does not work at all unless pushed from behind

 - does not leave the workplace clean after finishing work

 - sometimes leaves work too early.