Na sod it burn the bridges and pull ya trousers down and tell ya old boss too kiss you where you poo.

Personally when i leave a job i couldn't give a rats arse what they say or dont say in a reference...its your talents that will get you your next job.
My letter would be along the lines of.........
Dear Mr Manager (or Dear Mr c**k sucker as we like to call you)
It has been my displeasure working for you for a long time now and i have finally made the decision too leave your employment,of course this wasn't an easy decision as the bonus will be missed,the petty cash tin will no doubt be much fuller and the items of stock i would regularly helped myself too will also be sorely missed.
However i certainly wont be sorry to end the affair I'm having with your wife,ever since she found me having sex with your daughter on your desk she has been like a nymphomaniac....even after i gave her venereal disease she still insisted i had sexual in intercourse with her,as you can imagine your daughter was none too pleased when she realised she also had it,as i believe you may have since Ive often seen you scratching your tom Jones while looking at my with your narrow piggy eyes.
Yours sincerely
Father of your daughters child and your future son in law.
Ok so im at work and im bored.......
