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[redelitev6]

  I have the sad task of being a pallbearer at my mates mothers funeral , apart from the obvious (don't drop it) anybody got any advice on this ?

[cam2502]

Done it a couple of times over the years. Never a nice experience. The coffins usually heavier than u think , even with 8 men holding it, so just make sure you have a tight grip.

[Mrs Cakey]

Lazydocker has done it several times. His advice is to wear a little padding on the shoulders

The Funeral Directors will give you all the help and advice you need. They will probably lift up onto your shoulders for you and take down too. They will also pair you up with someone similar in height

Last one he did they carried the coffin down the road from the church to cemetary (just under a mile) which he said was a little OTT

[albitz]

Yes,just the once for my Mum. As said,funeral directors will guide you and make sure everything goes smoothly.

[hercules]

i did it for my grandad and yes its heavy and a nerving experiance but the proffesionals as said do help and make sure it goes smooth,hardest part i found was managing not to break down as we entered the chappel.my bottom lip was going like the clappers 

[Bionic]

  That used to be one of my jobs for Ginns and Gutteridge in Leicester and I have done literally thousands of them. What is it that you need to know and I will pass on my vast experience if you PM me.
This is no P take either........its too sad for any tomfoolery I reckon.

[TheBoy]

Yeah, done it 

Its an honour, obviously, but invariably someone close, so you won't be yourself on the day. Just listen to the directors on the day.

And yes, they are heavy.

[Andy B]

As above. You'll be guided by the funeral directors. They'll lift the coffin into place & ensure you're all OK to go. (done quite a few in a professional capacity ...... American caskets are really really heavy  )

[bertie1.8vectra]

Yep been there a few times.... All I can say is what's already been said listen to funeral directors and hold your emotions in check as best you can....

[redelitev6]

Thanks for all the help with this , everything went ok, although i wasn't expecting to lower the coffin into the ground, that was a very sombre experience

[Entwood]

Thanks for all the help with this , everything went ok, although i wasn't expecting to lower the coffin into the ground, that was a very sombre experience

Yup .. sort of gets to you that bit .. although I once had to lower a foriegn made coffin - Serviceman had died overseas - that was not "slab sided" like UK ones .. and it got stuck half way down !! ... it was also very heavy being lead-lined .... little bit of muttering between the 6 of us .. bent arms and raised it about a foot and a half, then dropped it back down ... it dislodged the offending lump of earth and dropped past it .. one hell of a "jar" as the slings re-caught... we were taken to one side after by the vicar and he actually bought us all a pint !!  He had seen it all of course, but not a single member of the watching family and guests had noticed anything amiss !!

In all the funerals I've been to, as a pall bearer (5), an usher (4) or just as a "friend" (too many) the part that really gets to me is the flypast as the coffin is lowered, don't know why .. but that hits home .. hard ..