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[Richie London]

When David was a little boy, he used to go around school putting his hand up the girls dresses. Eventually his teacher pulled him to one side and said "David, girls have teeth down there and if you do it again you'll get your fingers bitten off".

So David grows up avoiding sex and he eventually gets married to the woman he loves and they're on their hooneymoon. His wife is lying on the bed saying "David, come on its our hooneymoon, lets make love right now" and David, being petrified of getting bitten says "No, you'll bite me with your teeth down there". His new wife, looking shocked, pulls off her underwear and opens her legs. "Look for yourself, I have no teeth down there..".

David spends some time pacing around the bed, examining his new wifes vagina and after about 30 minutes shes says "I have no teeth there David."

He says "I'm not rather surprised seeing the state of your gums".

[Jimbob]

 


Suggest you watch the film 'Teeth' 

[Richie London]

A man walks into a bar in ireland. He sees a huge jar of pound coins sitting on the counter in front of him.
Puzzled by this he asks the barman, "Whats this for?"
to which the barman replies "Well, theres a horse out back, if you can make him laugh then you can have the jar, it costs a pound to do it"
So the man decides to have a go. He deposits his pound in the jar and walks out back.
Less than 2 minutes later the man walks back in and the horse can be heard laughing. He takes the jar of pound coins and leaves.
Six months later the man decides to go back to the bar. He walks in and sees a new jar on the counter. Again he's puzzled by this. He asks the barman "Whats this for?"
The barman replies "Well since you won the last jar, now you have to deposit a pound and make the same horse cry"
The man thinks to himself for a while and decides to have a go, he deposits his pound in the jar and goes outside to the horse.
Less than 2 minutes later the man walks in and the horse is heard crying. He goes to take the jar of pound coins but is stopped by the barman.
The barman says "Hold on a sec there mate, you've gotta tell me how you did that, thats twice now"
So the man puts his jar back down on the counter and sits at the bar and the barman pours him a pint. The man says "Six months ago, you asked me to make the horse laugh, so i went and i told him that i had a bigger dick than him"
The barman laughs and says "Thats fair enough mate?"
The man then says "Now i've come back and you've asked me to make the horse cry...so i showed him"

[Dishevelled Den]

  to both 

[Stevie-blunder]

Very good 

[amigov6]

I am that bloke!!!

[waspy]

  Nice

[amigov6]

Nice

Jazz!!!!!