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[Richie London]

one of mine was watching him go mad looking for his glasses which was on his forehead. blaming everyone else for moving them. 

i got a massive lecture one day about my 3 day drinking binges and the state i was coming home in. pi$$in on the carpet and trying to get in the wardrobes. next morning i came down in a right state see my dad with a big cut across his nose. he'd fallen over in the bathroom hammered and wacked his nose on the sink. i darent say anything or i would of got a right wallop. id just love to know what he was thinking when he heard me coming down the stairs 

[TheBoy]

Not much I could repeat on a public forum.  I am my father - manorisms, sayings, language  , views, personality. 

He always did the glasses on forehead routine. I remember once he was actually wearing them and shouting where were his glasses.  I got a smacking for daring to tell him he was wearing them - he thought I was being cheeky!  When he realised, rather than apologise, said I probably deserved it anyway (probably very true!)

[doog]

one of mine was watching him go mad looking for his glasses which was on his forehead. blaming everyone else for moving them. 

i got a massive lecture one day about my 3 day drinking binges and the state i was coming home in. pi$$in on the carpet and trying to get in the wardrobes. next morning i came down in a right state see my dad with a big cut across his nose. he'd fallen over in the bathroom hammered and wacked his nose on the sink. i darent say anything or i would of got a right wallop. id just love to know what he was thinking when he heard me coming down the stairs 

my dad being in hospital for an operation on his piles 
singing at the top of his voice "ring of fire" in the ward

Doug

[bertiecbx550]

I asked me dad for a lift to macclesfield the once to collect a fairing for my gt550...He drove us up there in his reliant regal....Most of it in the outside lane of the M6 he was bloody mental that bloke....I miss him terribly now though...

[waspy]

I was a bugger for playing tricks on folk & i used to build man traps (as i used to call them as a kid) around the farm. It wasn't funny at the time, but it is a little funny now. He stepped right in one, right infront of me before i could say anything & grazed all his shin. I departed the place like my arse was on fire before it really was
I didn't build any more man traps after that

Thinking about it now he could've broken his leg, but kids don't think that way

[cruisetopoland]

My Dad's still funny, but I remeber these:

Driving our Fiat 126 over Packhorse Bridge in Hampton-In-Arden (before it was railed off)-this meant driving over a bridge narrower than the car, with the wheels on the edge stones (wall) with only 2" of the inside of the wheel hanging on.

Racing me in my Alfasud, in his Lada Riva 1200L-but he cheated and went the wrong way around the island...

Silently shaking uncontrollably with laughter when my Mother (a vicar) started her sermon "when I lie back and think of England...." without realising the connotations of the phrase.

Drinking the best part of a bottle of sherry while serving the churchwardens theirs and then disappearing-only to be found fast asleep on a pew.

Trying to explain to my social worker sister how many years ago he had got his deaf without speech neighbours to stop arguing by shouting at them in "deaf and dumb language"....

When my friend put fairy liquid in the kettle which then filled the kitchen to 4" deep in foam when boiling, he believed my hysterical friend who said he had just filled it from the hot tap-then gave the lecture about the dangers of drinking water from the hot tap beacuse of ug-bugs and pigeons in the tank...

Generally all of the silly jokes, puns and giggling, bless him 

[Mr Skrunts]

Not really funny (ish) but memorable.  We had quite a big garden and once a year had a massive tidy up followed with a bonfire. All the wood went in a pile, all the weeds from digging the garden, more wood and burnable junk from the garage, then my Mum had junk that would burn, loads of card board, old paint tipped out, old bottles of oil, you name it, it went on.

This bonfire stood 5+ feet tall with a load of branches after tree pruning to add to the fire.  Realising he should have built the bonfire over the braches to let the air circulate to ignite the fire he decided to use an accelerant - Petrol.

He poured/sprinkled petrol over the bonfire and well dowsed the base, ran a trail to the shed,  happy with the preparation he double checked, plus checked his route to the back of the shed as the fire took hold.

Anyways, he lit the petrol trail and whoooooooooooosh up went the flames and what must have been a combination of heat build up and explosion he was pushed/thrown into the shed and the whooosh of the heat came into the shed and threw the door shut, so my old man stayed in there and lit a fag while the fire settled.

When he came out of the shed 2 mins later a few of the neighbers were searching the garden looking for him, he was howling with laughter , but then realised how serious it was when they told him a big cloud of black smoke rose into the air in a mushroom shape like an atom bomb going off.

[Stevie-blunder]

Not really funny (ish) but memorable.  We had quite a big garden and once a year had a massive tidy up followed with a bonfire. All the wood went in a pile, all the weeds from digging the garden, more wood and burnable junk from the garage, then my Mum had junk that would burn, loads of card board, old paint tipped out, old bottles of oil, you name it, it went on.

This bonfire stood 5+ feet tall with a load of branches after tree pruning to add to the fire.  Realising he should have built the bonfire over the braches to let the air circulate to ignite the fire he decided to use an accelerant - Petrol.

He poured/sprinkled petrol over the bonfire and well dowsed the base, ran a trail to the shed,  happy with the preparation he double checked, plus checked his route to the back of the shed as the fire took hold.

Anyways, he lit the petrol trail and whoooooooooooosh up went the flames and what must have been a combination of heat build up and explosion he was pushed/thrown into the shed and the whooosh of the heat came into the shed and threw the door shut, so my old man stayed in there and lit a fag while the fire settled.

When he came out of the shed 2 mins later a few of the neighbers were searching the garden looking for him, he was howling with laughter , but then realised how serious it was when they told him a big cloud of black smoke rose into the air in a mushroom shape like an atom bomb going off.

Could actually picture that in my mind  Found it hilarious 

[STMO999]

The funniest thing my dad did was when I'd been really naughty and he tried to hang my puppy. He'd no sooner strung the little fella up when it peed all over his face. Jeez, we laughed and laughed.

[Mr Skrunts]

Another thing he used to do.

In the 70's we had a holiday bungalow down in Chapel St Leonards that we used to go down to at weekends and holidays, anyway he used to get pissed off with the mods and rockers on scooters that used to overtake in precarious situations whether going in the same direction or oncoming direction to us. 

He realised with all the mirrors on he would be seen behind them.  So the BMW 2500 we had he had a twin dip and/or twin main beam headlight system fitted.  So the weekends when the scooters hit the roads and there was an oppotunity to overtake, he would instantly indicate, pull the headlamp main beam and just gun it to overtake 2 or 3 cars at a time, it was so funny watching the scooters pulling in and dropping back as my old man never backed down (and yes, he did it in a way that he could allways drop back and pull into a gap rather than risk any lives), unlike the mods and rockers who thought they ruled the roads by thinking that 10, 20 30 more scooters could overtake at a time and oncoming cars would move out of thier way.

Best game of Chicken I ever saw.