sincere condolences,know what you are going through,its awful
Im expecting this shortly meself,
my father is also 85 can barely move out of his wheelchair,is a proud ex navy man,absolutley refuses to go into a care home,hates the hospital as he is sure he wont come out,doctors refuse to come to him now,
has liver disease,full blown type 1 diabetes,lost use of legs virtually, his feet are enormous and has no feeling in them(myopathy?) cataracts in both eyes, almost deaf,
yet his heart and lungs are fine its just the rest that is completely knackered,
way back in 65 he actually won the court case for him to bring up 5 children on his own, which was unheard of in those days,stopped us all going to a childrens home, had 3 jobs to keep us all together, never complained once, so i have the utmost respect for him,but he refuses to help himself in anyway at all by going to the hospital,he says his time is up and dont regret a minute of his life,