Omega Owners Forum

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

News:

Please play nicely.  No one wants to listen/read a keyboard warriors rants....

Pages: 1 [2] 3  All   Go Down

Author Topic: Why I love Poetry  (Read 1751 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

threppence

  • Junior Member
  • **
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Leeds
  • Posts: 141
    • View Profile
Re: Why I love Poetry
« Reply #15 on: 17 December 2009, 20:03:04 »

'We're of cat food' said my wife
'I'll nip out forthwith' said I
T'was sunny but cold cut like a knife
To the pet shop on the High
Street I went without a care
To purchase cat food there
But alas the sky grew dark
And down came the snow
A laugh and lark
With the owner whom I know
She has two dogs in the back
Their wagging tales cheered my heart
But homeward I must start
Thick as owt the snow had fell
Gonna be tricky  could tell
But happy as sandboys
I knew my miggy would cope
In i got safe with my toys
That would help should i need
Anti-lock brakes, only drive at low speed
I told myself as I pulled into traffic
Straight into the back of a C3 Fekking Anti-lock brakes did fwck all as ice and snow built up under wheels and BAM !!!!! Bye-bye car.

Think the end needs a little work
Logged
When INJUSTICE becomes LAW,

RESISTANCE becomes DUTY

Jimbob

  • Global Moderator
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Chester / Flintshire
  • Posts: 24530
  • I like traffic lights, but only when they're green
    • E250 Est / Golf GTI
    • View Profile
Re: Why I love Poetry
« Reply #16 on: 17 December 2009, 20:06:26 »

There was a young lady from Lunt...

 ;D ;D ;D

sexydaz

  • Guest
Re: Why I love Poetry
« Reply #17 on: 17 December 2009, 20:09:40 »

hmmm let me think hmmm what rhymes with lunt

oh yes its :-X
Logged

HolyCount

  • Guest
Re: Why I love Poetry
« Reply #18 on: 17 December 2009, 20:18:22 »

Quote
There was a young lady from Lunt...

 ;D ;D ;D

Whose nose was incredibly blunt
Logged

HolyCount

  • Guest
Re: Why I love Poetry
« Reply #19 on: 17 December 2009, 20:22:13 »

Mary had a little Lamb,
She fed it castor oil,
And everywhere that Mary went
it fertilized the soil.

Mary had a little Lamb,
She also had a duck,
She put them on the windowsill
To see if they would fall off.

Mary had a little watch
She swallowed it one day
And so she took some castor oil
To pass the time away.

The castor oil it did not work
The watch refused to pass,
So if you want to know the time,
Just look up ... at the clock.

Mary had a little Lamb,
It followed her to school,
They tied a brick around its neck
And drowned it in the pool.

Mary had a bicycle,
She rode it back to front,
And every time she turned a bend
The spokes went up her leg.

Mary had a little Lamb,
She took it to the zoo,
It got raped by an elephant
And had a kangaroo.

Mary had a little Lamb,
Her father shot it dead,
She still takes the lamb to school
Between two bits of bread.

Mary had a little Lamb,
You've heard that tale before,
But have you heard she passed her plate
And had a little more.

Mary had a little lamb
She tied it to a pylon
10 000 volts shot up its ...leg
And turned its wool to nylon

Mary had an little lamb
It danced in skips and hops,
It danced into the road one day
And ended up as chops

Mary had a little lamb
She also had a bear
I've often seen her little lamb
But I've never seen her bare.

Mary had a little dress
Its seam was split up high
And every where that Mary went
The boys could see her thigh

Mary had another dress 
Its seam was split up front
But she never wore that one!

Mary had a little lamb
The doctor was surprised
But when Old McDonald had a farm
He couldn't believe his eyes

Mary had a little lamb
Its fleece was black as soot
And everywhere that Mary went
Its sooty foot he put.

Mary had a little lamb
Its fleece was white as snow
Maar 'n ram het die lam gevang
En kyk hoe lyk hy nou!

They sat upon the grassy bank
And she was all a-quiver...
He undid her suspender belt
And her leg fell into the river!

Mary had a little lamb
and tied it to the heater,
every time it turned around
it burned its little peter!

Mary had a little lamb
She ate it with mint sauce
And everywhere that Mary went
The lamb went too, of course

Mary had a little lamb,
And it was always grunting.
She tied to the garden fence,
And kicked it's ... favourite soccerball

Mary is a proper girl,
She goes to church on Sundays.
She prays that she will have the strength,
To chase the boys on Mondays.

A peanut sat on a railroad track
His heart was all a-flutter
A chooka train came round the bend,
TOOT TOOT Peanut butter.

A hen and a chicken went for a walk
Just to stretch their legs,
A motorcar came round the bend,
TOOT TOOT Ham and eggs.

Oh! the night was dark and dreary,
The air was full of sleet,
The old man stood out in the storm,
His shoes were full of feet.

Oh! Mosquito he fly high,
Mosquito he fly low,
If old man 'Skeeta light on me,
He ain't gonna fly no more.

Oh, of all the fishes in the sea,
My favorite is the bass,
He climbs up in the seaweed trees,
And slides down on his hands and knees.

An old man lay down by a sewer
And by a sewer he died.
Now, at the coroner's request,
They called it sewer-side.

A golf ball sailin' thru the air,
Whizzed by a man a hummin'
He heard a caddy holler, "Fore!"
An' he thought three more were comin'.

"The way to tell the twins apart,"
The proud father said,
"I put my finger in Willie's mouth,
If he bites it, then it's Ned."

When boating, never quarrel,
For you'll find, without a doubt,
A boat is not the proper place
To have a falling out.

"The coffee is exhausted, Sir."
The diner was advised.
Says he, "It's been so weak of late,
I'm really not surprised."

There's a gal up in the hills,
She's awfully shy and meek,
She undresses in the dark
Because the mountains peak.

Mary had a steamboat;
The steamboat had a bell.
Mary went to heaven,
The steamboat went "Toot, toot."

When Mary had a little lamb,
The doctor almost cried.
But when Ol' MacDonald had a farm,
The doctor almost died.

Said baby tern to mother tern,
"Can I have a brother."
"Yes" said mom to baby tern,
"One good tern deserves another."

Oh for a home where the buffalo roam,
Where the deer and the antelope play.
Where seldon is heard a discouraging word,
For what can an antelope say?
Logged

sexydaz

  • Guest
Re: Why I love Poetry
« Reply #20 on: 17 December 2009, 20:29:18 »

Quote
Mary had a little Lamb,
She fed it castor oil,
And everywhere that Mary went
it fertilized the soil.

Mary had a little Lamb,
She also had a duck,
She put them on the windowsill
To see if they would fall off.

Mary had a little watch
She swallowed it one day
And so she took some castor oil
To pass the time away.

The castor oil it did not work
The watch refused to pass,
So if you want to know the time,
Just look up ... at the clock.

Mary had a little Lamb,
It followed her to school,
They tied a brick around its neck
And drowned it in the pool.

Mary had a bicycle,
She rode it back to front,
And every time she turned a bend
The spokes went up her leg.

Mary had a little Lamb,
She took it to the zoo,
It got raped by an elephant
And had a kangaroo.

Mary had a little Lamb,
Her father shot it dead,
She still takes the lamb to school
Between two bits of bread.

Mary had a little Lamb,
You've heard that tale before,
But have you heard she passed her plate
And had a little more.

Mary had a little lamb
She tied it to a pylon
10 000 volts shot up its ...leg
And turned its wool to nylon

Mary had an little lamb
It danced in skips and hops,
It danced into the road one day
And ended up as chops

Mary had a little lamb
She also had a bear
I've often seen her little lamb
But I've never seen her bare.

Mary had a little dress
Its seam was split up high
And every where that Mary went
The boys could see her thigh

Mary had another dress 
Its seam was split up front
But she never wore that one!

Mary had a little lamb
The doctor was surprised
But when Old McDonald had a farm
He couldn't believe his eyes

Mary had a little lamb
Its fleece was black as soot
And everywhere that Mary went
Its sooty foot he put.

Mary had a little lamb
Its fleece was white as snow
Maar 'n ram het die lam gevang
En kyk hoe lyk hy nou!

They sat upon the grassy bank
And she was all a-quiver...
He undid her suspender belt
And her leg fell into the river!

Mary had a little lamb
and tied it to the heater,
every time it turned around
it burned its little peter!

Mary had a little lamb
She ate it with mint sauce
And everywhere that Mary went
The lamb went too, of course

Mary had a little lamb,
And it was always grunting.
She tied to the garden fence,
And kicked it's ... favourite soccerball

Mary is a proper girl,
She goes to church on Sundays.
She prays that she will have the strength,
To chase the boys on Mondays.

A peanut sat on a railroad track
His heart was all a-flutter
A chooka train came round the bend,
TOOT TOOT Peanut butter.

A hen and a chicken went for a walk
Just to stretch their legs,
A motorcar came round the bend,
TOOT TOOT Ham and eggs.

Oh! the night was dark and dreary,
The air was full of sleet,
The old man stood out in the storm,
His shoes were full of feet.

Oh! Mosquito he fly high,
Mosquito he fly low,
If old man 'Skeeta light on me,
He ain't gonna fly no more.

Oh, of all the fishes in the sea,
My favorite is the bass,
He climbs up in the seaweed trees,
And slides down on his hands and knees.

An old man lay down by a sewer
And by a sewer he died.
Now, at the coroner's request,
They called it sewer-side.

A golf ball sailin' thru the air,
Whizzed by a man a hummin'
He heard a caddy holler, "Fore!"
An' he thought three more were comin'.

"The way to tell the twins apart,"
The proud father said,
"I put my finger in Willie's mouth,
If he bites it, then it's Ned."

When boating, never quarrel,
For you'll find, without a doubt,
A boat is not the proper place
To have a falling out.

"The coffee is exhausted, Sir."
The diner was advised.
Says he, "It's been so weak of late,
I'm really not surprised."

There's a gal up in the hills,
She's awfully shy and meek,
She undresses in the dark
Because the mountains peak.

Mary had a steamboat;
The steamboat had a bell.
Mary went to heaven,
The steamboat went "Toot, toot."

When Mary had a little lamb,
The doctor almost cried.
But when Ol' MacDonald had a farm,
The doctor almost died.

Said baby tern to mother tern,
"Can I have a brother."
"Yes" said mom to baby tern,
"One good tern deserves another."

Oh for a home where the buffalo roam,
Where the deer and the antelope play.
Where seldon is heard a discouraging word,
For what can an antelope say?
is that all yer know,yer memory must be shocking
Logged

HolyCount

  • Guest
Re: Why I love Poetry
« Reply #21 on: 18 December 2009, 20:17:34 »

Quote
is that all yer know,yer memory must be shocking

It's an "age thing" Herc  ;D ::)

I remember, many, many years ago I was on a night shift and bored. I found a few verses of Eskimo Nell on the works computer and decided to print them out .... big mistake !! I tied up the office printer for 4 hours and wasted reams of paper !!!  No abort button either !!!!
Logged

sexydaz

  • Guest
Re: Why I love Poetry
« Reply #22 on: 18 December 2009, 20:37:10 »

Quote
Quote
is that all yer know,yer memory must be shocking

It's an "age thing" Herc  ;D ::)

I remember, many, many years ago I was on a night shift and bored. I found a few verses of Eskimo Nell on the works computer and decided to print them out .... big mistake !! I tied up the office printer for 4 hours and wasted reams of paper !!!  No abort button either !!!!
bloody hell just read it all of it,id never heard of it

very good :y
Logged

HolyCount

  • Guest
Re: Why I love Poetry
« Reply #23 on: 18 December 2009, 20:42:28 »

Quote
Quote
is that all yer know,yer memory must be shocking

It's an "age thing" Herc  ;D ::)

I remember, many, many years ago I was on a night shift and bored. I found a few verses of Eskimo Nell on the works computer and decided to print them out .... big mistake !! I tied up the office printer for 4 hours and wasted reams of paper !!!  No abort button either !!!!

I ought to add that, over the years, the lads had added several hundred plus "verses" of their own --- another by-product of boring night shifts!
Logged

jereboam

  • Omega Knight
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Suffolk
  • Posts: 1786
    • 1999 Omega Elite 3.0
    • View Profile
Re: Why I love Poetry
« Reply #24 on: 18 December 2009, 20:54:50 »

Quote
Quote
is that all yer know,yer memory must be shocking

It's an "age thing" Herc  ;D ::)

I remember, many, many years ago I was on a night shift and bored. I found a few verses of Eskimo Nell on the works computer and decided to print them out .... big mistake !! I tied up the office printer for 4 hours and wasted reams of paper !!!  No abort button either !!!!

That takes me back a bit.  I spent a lot of time trying to suppress Eskimo Nell, Star Trek and Dungeon, but as soon as I got rid of them some conniving b*st*rd would put them back on the machine again.  Never found out how - no internet in those days, so they must have been conspiring with the operations people. :)
Logged
I can be handy mending a fuse - but stuff the Isle of Wight

kevinminton

  • Guest
Re: Why I love Poetry
« Reply #25 on: 19 December 2009, 21:50:45 »

So let us go then, you and I ...
off to our favourite poetry.

Thanks Zulu77 for the ee c. a whole new canon to me.

(not scanning well so far).

Funny, baffling, profound: try H McDiarmid: http://www2.arts.gla.ac.uk/SESLL/STELLA/STARN/crit/NORTHERN/20thpoet.htm.

Similarly, brothers and sisters, R Burns: http://www.robertburns.org/works/496.shtml.

K
« Last Edit: 19 December 2009, 21:54:12 by kevinminton »
Logged

jereboam

  • Omega Knight
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Gender: Male
  • Suffolk
  • Posts: 1786
    • 1999 Omega Elite 3.0
    • View Profile
Re: Why I love Poetry
« Reply #26 on: 19 December 2009, 22:26:52 »

Quote
Funny, baffling, profound: try H McDiarmid: http://www2.arts.gla.ac.uk/SESLL/STELLA/STARN/crit/NORTHERN/20thpoet.htm.

Similarly, brothers and sisters, R Burns: http://www.robertburns.org/works/496.shtml.

K

Don't forget the man who did for Scottish poetry what Sir Fred Goodwin did for Scottish banking
http://www.mcgonagall-online.org.uk/poems/pgdisaster.htm
Logged
I can be handy mending a fuse - but stuff the Isle of Wight

Dishevelled Den

  • Omega Queen
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 12545
    • View Profile
Re: Why I love Poetry
« Reply #27 on: 19 December 2009, 22:31:19 »

Quote
So let us go then, you and I ...
off to our favourite poetry.

Thanks Zulu77 for the ee c. a whole new canon to me.

(not scanning well so far).

Funny, baffling, profound: try H McDiarmid: http://www2.arts.gla.ac.uk/SESLL/STELLA/STARN/crit/NORTHERN/20thpoet.htm.

Similarly, brothers and sisters, R Burns: http://www.robertburns.org/works/496.shtml.

K


Funny, baffling, profound: try H McDiarmid: http://www2.arts.gla.ac.uk/SESLL/STELLA/STARN/crit/NORTHERN/20thpoet.htm.


Agreed K, I also feel that when such works depart from the higher language the dialect used gives much more emphasis to the intent of the writer.

Although it can be difficult to read - witness Kipling when he uses the base delivery of the ordinary Tommy in his various military pieces - the overall effect is profound to say the least but such works only come really alive when read by a native speaker.
Logged

kevinminton

  • Guest
Re: Why I love Poetry
« Reply #28 on: 19 December 2009, 22:49:38 »

Sometimes the opaqueness of the language adds to the continuing interest in / mystery of the words. But, as you say, only up to a point. I recall skipping some of the Plain Tales from the Hills due to the Tommies. (now you've reminded me of it, I'll have to get my copy down from the loft. Whilst there, i'll get HH Munro as well ...)
Others (eg Eliot) are opaque enough in parts without the added complication of dialect. Makes me wonder how much of what we get from poetry is our superimposition on it, rather than the author's original intent.
Logged

Dishevelled Den

  • Omega Queen
  • *****
  • Offline Offline
  • Posts: 12545
    • View Profile
Re: Why I love Poetry
« Reply #29 on: 19 December 2009, 22:51:53 »

Considering how words come alive when read by a native speaker - delivered here in something very near to an Ulster/Scots dialect;


[media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZBUP0M4AS0U&feature=related[/media]


Logged
Pages: 1 [2] 3  All   Go Up
 

Page created in 0.014 seconds with 16 queries.