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[paul.lovejoy]

Once they sort out all the drink drivers, the drug drivers, the uninsured, the speeders, the wreckless, the incompetent, the dangerous drivers, the "I don't give a crap" drivers, the unlicensed drivers, and then sort themselves out and send their drivers to driving school, I think we'd all be quite happy for people with runny nose to be targeted,  as we'd be living in a perfect world. Bloody robots

what about women on there monthly cycle who are a big risk from road rage

they use mopeds down here  what about women on the school run.I always stay off the road if possible during this stressful part of the day .......bing just remebered a joke quick must get to the joke section before i forget

[Kevin Wood]

My sentiments exactly, I'd much rather share the road with someone who has OD'd on a bottle of Night Nurse than any of the above examples.
Pretty much anything we do in a car these days is becoming an "offence", I'm just wondering if it's being done to raise money in general or it's being done to help clear the over congested crap they laughingly call a road when you hit 12 points after doing what you've been doing the last 25 years without incident.

I reckon it's down to the standard of drivers we're churning out at the moment. When some of them are barely acceptable on the easiest of roads, in perfect weather conditions when feeling 100% bright eyed and bushy tailed, driving a perfectly maintained vehicle, you have to legislate to prevent them taking to the roads when their meagre abilities are likely to be compromised by anything.

[Martian]

My sentiments exactly, I'd much rather share the road with someone who has OD'd on a bottle of Night Nurse than any of the above examples.
Pretty much anything we do in a car these days is becoming an "offence", I'm just wondering if it's being done to raise money in general or it's being done to help clear the over congested crap they laughingly call a road when you hit 12 points after doing what you've been doing the last 25 years without incident.

I reckon it's down to the standard of drivers we're churning out at the moment. When some of them are barely acceptable on the easiest of roads, in perfect weather conditions when feeling 100% bright eyed and bushy tailed, driving a perfectly maintained vehicle, you have to legislate to prevent them taking to the roads when their meagre abilities are likely to be compromised by anything.

I'm so glad you said that because for a while now I have been thinking that it must be me doing something wrong because there can't possibly be that many piss poor drivers out there.

I think we should throw out all the "theory" and "hazard perception" bo*****s from the current driving test and go back to "old skool" (70's/80's) methods.

I propose that the driving test should be a one day event, the test car should be something like an old 325i (or any rear wheel drive car with similar power/weight) with absolutely NO electronic driving aids fitted at all, and the test "track" should be the roads of Central London (or any other major city) on a crappy day.

The test requirement is rather simple......if you can make it around London for the whole day without crashing and without f*****g yourself or anybody else up along the way, then you've passed.

[TheBoy]

My sentiments exactly, I'd much rather share the road with someone who has OD'd on a bottle of Night Nurse than any of the above examples.

You wouldn't want to share the road with me after a normal measure of Night Nurse.  2hrs later, honestly, I'm out for the count for about 10hrs. Gay, I know.  Mind you, being a fat bastard, I pop half an asprin before getting on a plane, to keep the blood thin. Thats enough to make me miss the on-flight film, and gets me just grumpy enough to lack patience with baggage handlers and airport officials when I land....

[TheBoy]

My sentiments exactly, I'd much rather share the road with someone who has OD'd on a bottle of Night Nurse than any of the above examples.
Pretty much anything we do in a car these days is becoming an "offence", I'm just wondering if it's being done to raise money in general or it's being done to help clear the over congested crap they laughingly call a road when you hit 12 points after doing what you've been doing the last 25 years without incident.

I reckon it's down to the standard of drivers we're churning out at the moment. When some of them are barely acceptable on the easiest of roads, in perfect weather conditions when feeling 100% bright eyed and bushy tailed, driving a perfectly maintained vehicle, you have to legislate to prevent them taking to the roads when their meagre abilities are likely to be compromised by anything.

I'm so glad you said that because for a while now I have been thinking that it must be me doing something wrong because there can't possibly be that many piss poor drivers out there.

I was saying moaning about this only last week.  We put it down to just being Milton Keynes (where I work) being having an unfair number of retards.

[LJay]

Once they sort out all the drink drivers, the drug drivers, the uninsured, the speeders, the wreckless, the incompetent, the dangerous drivers, the "I don't give a crap" drivers, the unlicensed drivers, and then sort themselves out and send their drivers to driving school, I think we'd all be quite happy for people with runny nose to be targeted,  as we'd be living in a perfect world. Bloody robots

what about women on there monthly cycle who are a big risk from road rage

Steady on!  I don't need PMT to get road rage.....just having to share the roads with male drivers triggers it nicely!

[LJay]

Men with colds should defo not be behind the wheel!  They're far too busy moaning about their potentially fatal case of Manflu (a slight sniffle) to concentrate on driving properly!


Just think how much congestion would be eased if Manflu were fatal......

[TheBoy]

Steady on!  I don't need PMT to get road rage.....just having to share the roads with male drivers triggers it nicely!

Clearly, we need gender specific roads, as its the girls who get me going.

They sit in the middle lanes, wait for rush hour to finish before pulling out at junctions, spend more time looking at the offspring in the car than the road, and drive like Miss Daisy.

See the odd bloke doing the same, but thats just a woman in a man's body.

[TheBoy]

Men with colds should defo not be behind the wheel!  They're far too busy moaning about their potentially fatal case of Manflu (a slight sniffle) to concentrate on driving properly!

Hence, I'm staying at home today.  I'd rather die at home. Manflu is always fatal.

[LJay]

Steady on!  I don't need PMT to get road rage.....just having to share the roads with male drivers triggers it nicely!

Clearly, we need gender specific roads, as its the girls who get me going.

They sit in the middle lanes, wait for rush hour to finish before pulling out at junctions, spend more time looking at the offspring in the car than the road, and drive like Miss Daisy.

See the odd bloke doing the same, but thats just a woman in a man's body.

Don't think I've ever driven like Miss Daisy, don't tend to use the wrong lane or hesitate pulling out!
Frequently get stuck behind blokes who do though, not to mention the ones driving powerful cars which they are terrified of.
Gender specific roads would be nice, no more failure to indicate, over taking when not safe to do so, cutting up etc...

[TheBoy]

Don't think I've ever driven like Miss Daisy, don't tend to use the wrong lane or hesitate pulling out!

Are you a man?

Frequently get stuck behind blokes who do though, not to mention the ones driving powerful cars which they are terrified of.

Ladyboys, you mean?

Gender specific roads would be nice, no more failure to indicate, over taking when not safe to do so, cutting up etc...

Exactly!

[LJay]

Don't think I've ever driven like Miss Daisy, don't tend to use the wrong lane or hesitate pulling out!

Are you a man?

Frequently get stuck behind blokes who do though, not to mention the ones driving powerful cars which they are terrified of.

Ladyboys, you mean?

Gender specific roads would be nice, no more failure to indicate, over taking when not safe to do so, cutting up etc...

Exactly!

Not last time I looked, though you wouldn't notice....far more interested in tea!

Ladyboys are still men...therefore subject to men's appalling driving habits!

[hotel21]

Men with colds should defo not be behind the wheel!  They're far too busy moaning about their potentially fatal case of Manflu (a slight sniffle) to concentrate on driving properly!

Hence, I'm staying at home today.  I'd rather die at home. Manflu is always fatal.

Man Flu - The Facts...

1. Man-Flu is more painful than childbirth. This is an irrefutable scientific fact. (Based on a survey of over 100,000 men.)

2. Man-Flu is not 'just a cold'. It is a condition so severe that the germs from a single Man-Flu sneeze could wipe out entire tribes of people living in the rainforest. And probably loads of monkeys too.

3. Women do not contract Man-Flu. At worst they suffer from what is medically recognised as a 'Mild Girly Sniffle' - which, if a man caught, he would still be able to run, throw a ball, tear the phone book in half and compete in all other kinds of manly activities.

4. Men do not 'moan' when they have Man-Flu. They emit involuntary groans of agony that are entirely in proportion to the unbearable pain they are in.

5. Full recovery from Man-Flu will take place much quicker if their simple requests for care, sympathy and regular cups of tea are met. Is that really so much to ask? Florence Nightingale would have done it.

6. More men die each year from MFN (Man-Flu Neglect) than lots and lots of other things. (Like rabbit attacks or choking on toast).

7. Men suffering from Man-Flu want nothing more than to get out of bed and come to work, but they are too selfless to risk spreading this awful condition amongst their friends and colleagues. In this sense, they are the greatest heroes this country has ever known.

8. In 1982 scientists managed to simulate the agonising symptoms of full blown Man-Flu in a female chimp. She became so ill that her head literally fell off.

9. Man-Flu germs are more powerful than He-Man, The Thundercats and The A-Team combined. They are too strong for weak, nasty tasting 'lady medicines' like Lemsip, so don't bother trying to force them on a victim of Man-Flu.

10. While it may seem like a Man-Flu sufferer is just lying around enjoying 'Diagnosis Murder' it is a commonly recognised medical fact that the exact pitch and frequency of Dick Van Dyke's voice has remarkable soothing powers.


Every minute in this country one man is struck down by Man-Flu. Women, all we ask is that each of you offers them a cup of tea, some kind words and your undivided attention and care. Then maybe, just maybe, we'll beat this monstrous disease together...

[albitz]

Very wise words Brucie.

[paul.lovejoy]

very well said that man