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Chat Area => General Discussion Area => Topic started by: tigers_gonads on 15 October 2013, 16:37:06

Title: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: tigers_gonads on 15 October 2013, 16:37:06
Oh well, my little boy is 18 next week, growing up bloody too fast and is starting to take after me according to the missus  ::)

Last week, she was hoovering his bedroom out when she found a box under his bed containing a collection of w*n* mags   :-X ;D
The look on his face was a picture when I told him what she had found and has been rather sheepish ever since  ;D ;D

Sunday night, he went to a mates 18th birthday party complete with a bottle in his hand so me and the missus nipped into town for a wetherspoons burger deal and a few pints.
Got home about 9 o'clock and sat down to watch Homeland in peace for a change.
Well ten minutes pass and the phone rings ................  answers the phone to hear its the birthday boys dad on the phone  ???
It turns out that my little angel has got himself totally rat arsed and while chatting up his mates sister who I must say is 17, and absolutely drop dead gorgeous ............... he gives it the good old 5 finger spread all over her nice pink dress  (I know I shouldn't laugh but  ;D ;D ;D)
She screams ............. he staggers up the stairs to the toilet where he is found 5 minutes later with his jeans and boxers round his ankles and his head in the bowl while talking to god on the great white telephone  ::) ;D
I've been told by one of his mates that pictures will be available shortly  ;)

So ..................... he is out of it ..................... I've had a drink so driving is out of the question and the dad is saying, come and get him out of here ...... NOW  ::)

Lucky, a very good mate of mine who lives around the corner agrees to take me around there.
Walked round the back to see him sat in a patio chair with his head over a railing and he is out for the count.
The poor girl was still in tears but the dad was okay about it so we dragged him up and out to the waiting car, I jumped in the back and we strapped him to the front seat and drove slowly home.
Dragged him home and sat him in the corner of the sofa with his head in a bucket and watched him for the next 2 hours until he started to come around.   
By 12:30am ,  he was semi conscious so I dragged him out the house wearing just his jeans, t shirt and shoes and we went for a walk in the rain for a good 30 minutes to wake him up  ::)
Got back sometime after 1am with him alive but not feeling very clever  ;)
Spent most of the night in and out of his bedroom to make sure he was okay then woke him up at 6:30 for collage  ;D  He wasn't amused  ;D ;D ;D

Just waiting for the pictures and a bill for a new dress now  ::)
I know it won't be me who's paying  ;) ;)
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: henryd on 15 October 2013, 16:48:34
Oh well, my little boy is 18 next week, growing up bloody too fast and is starting to take after me according to the missus  ::)

Last week, she was hoovering his bedroom out when she found a box under his bed containing a collection of w*n* mags   :-X ;D
The look on his face was a picture when I told him what she had found and has been rather sheepish ever since  ;D ;D

Sunday night, he went to a mates 18th birthday party complete with a bottle in his hand so me and the missus nipped into town for a wetherspoons burger deal and a few pints.
Got home about 9 o'clock and sat down to watch Homeland in peace for a change.
Well ten minutes pass and the phone rings ................  answers the phone to hear its the birthday boys dad on the phone  ???
It turns out that my little angel has got himself totally rat arsed and while chatting up his mates sister who I must say is 17, and absolutely drop dead gorgeous ............... he gives it the good old 5 finger spread all over her nice pink dress  (I know I shouldn't laugh but  ;D ;D ;D)
She screams ............. he staggers up the stairs to the toilet where he is found 5 minutes later with his jeans and boxers round his ankles and his head in the bowl while talking to god on the great white telephone  ::) ;D
I've been told by one of his mates that pictures will be available shortly  ;)

So ..................... he is out of it ..................... I've had a drink so driving is out of the question and the dad is saying, come and get him out of here ...... NOW  ::)

Lucky, a very good mate of mine who lives around the corner agrees to take me around there.
Walked round the back to see him sat in a patio chair with his head over a railing and he is out for the count.
The poor girl was still in tears but the dad was okay about it so we dragged him up and out to the waiting car, I jumped in the back and we strapped him to the front seat and drove slowly home.
Dragged him home and sat him in the corner of the sofa with his head in a bucket and watched him for the next 2 hours until he started to come around.   
By 12:30am ,  he was semi conscious so I dragged him out the house wearing just his jeans, t shirt and shoes and we went for a walk in the rain for a good 30 minutes to wake him up  ::)
Got back sometime after 1am with him alive but not feeling very clever  ;)
Spent most of the night in and out of his bedroom to make sure he was okay then woke him up at 6:30 for collage  ;D  He wasn't amused  ;D ;D ;D

Just waiting for the pictures and a bill for a new dress now  ::)
I know it won't be me who's paying  ;) ;)

Been there with our eldest,fortunately they do learn where there limit is......................................................eventually ::)
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: 05omegav6 on 15 October 2013, 16:51:56
Halcyon days ;D
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: Sir Tigger KC on 15 October 2013, 17:07:10
Ah bless!!  ;D 
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: Field Marshal Dr. Opti on 15 October 2013, 17:48:05
Oh well, my little boy is 18 next week, growing up bloody too fast and is starting to take after me according to the missus  ::)

Last week, she was hoovering his bedroom out when she found a box under his bed containing a collection of w*n* mags   :-X ;D
The look on his face was a picture when I told him what she had found and has been rather sheepish ever since  ;D ;D

Sunday night, he went to a mates 18th birthday party complete with a bottle in his hand so me and the missus nipped into town for a wetherspoons burger deal and a few pints.
Got home about 9 o'clock and sat down to watch Homeland in peace for a change.
Well ten minutes pass and the phone rings ................  answers the phone to hear its the birthday boys dad on the phone  ???
It turns out that my little angel has got himself totally rat arsed and while chatting up his mates sister who I must say is 17, and absolutely drop dead gorgeous ............... he gives it the good old 5 finger spread all over her nice pink dress  (I know I shouldn't laugh but  ;D ;D ;D)
She screams ............. he staggers up the stairs to the toilet where he is found 5 minutes later with his jeans and boxers round his ankles and his head in the bowl while talking to god on the great white telephone  ::) ;D
I've been told by one of his mates that pictures will be available shortly  ;)

So ..................... he is out of it ..................... I've had a drink so driving is out of the question and the dad is saying, come and get him out of here ...... NOW  ::)

Lucky, a very good mate of mine who lives around the corner agrees to take me around there.
Walked round the back to see him sat in a patio chair with his head over a railing and he is out for the count.
The poor girl was still in tears but the dad was okay about it so we dragged him up and out to the waiting car, I jumped in the back and we strapped him to the front seat and drove slowly home.
Dragged him home and sat him in the corner of the sofa with his head in a bucket and watched him for the next 2 hours until he started to come around.   
By 12:30am ,  he was semi conscious so I dragged him out the house wearing just his jeans, t shirt and shoes and we went for a walk in the rain for a good 30 minutes to wake him up  ::)
Got back sometime after 1am with him alive but not feeling very clever  ;)
Spent most of the night in and out of his bedroom to make sure he was okay then woke him up at 6:30 for collage  ;D  He wasn't amused  ;D ;D ;D

Just waiting for the pictures and a bill for a new dress now  ::)
I know it won't be me who's paying  ;) ;)

It's great being young. ;D ;D :y
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: Field Marshal Dr. Opti on 15 October 2013, 17:52:12
On my 18th I staggered home to find the whole of my bedroom carpet covered in newspaper and a large black bucket in the middle.

I was ill for days and apparently kept whimpering  'never again'  in between each projectile vomit.

Happy days/daze. :y :y :y ;)
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: Auto Addict on 15 October 2013, 17:53:00
When my lad was about 5, a few decades ago, me and my mates + their kids used to go to for a few drinks and a game of cards to a local club just before Sunday lunch.

The kids used to play the one armed bandit, and ferry the drinks from the bar to our card table.

No one noticed that my son won the jackpot, he went to the bar and ordered a pint on Guinness, the barman thought it was for one of us.

It wasn't till he was 2/3 of the way down it that someone noticed he was reeling all over the place.

I got some stick from my wife when I got him home, he had a hangover for 2 days ;D
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: MaxV6 on 15 October 2013, 17:55:03
on my 18th birthday, well, actually i have NO idea.....   

 :y


I'm told i was on tour,  somewhere ....   i believe it might have been Germany....     


i have no idea.....      about 2 solid weeks is a complete mystery to me.

Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: tigers_gonads on 15 October 2013, 18:07:20
I spent my 18th birthday peeling piggin spuds in the cookhouse of the sergeants mess at Raf Halton  ::)

Walking to class first thing ............... end of January with lots of snow on the ground ................. snowball fight starts and I get one in the head ............. so I make myself a nice big one and throw, miss badly ............. well actually miss very badly because it flies over said targets head ................ travels another 50 yards or so and tw*ts the station commander who was taking a parade on the square  in the head  :o :'( :'(

He didn't see the funny side  ::)
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: MR MISTER on 15 October 2013, 18:26:13
I spent mine doing basic training at Catterick Garrison. They don't give you time off to celebrate.
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: Field Marshal Dr. Opti on 15 October 2013, 18:27:09
I spent mine doing basic training at Catterick Garrison. They don't give you time off to celebrate.

Is that a prison?...... ;D ;D ;)
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: MR MISTER on 15 October 2013, 18:30:41
I spent mine doing basic training at Catterick Garrison. They don't give you time off to celebrate.

Is that a prison?...... ;D ;D ;)
Sort of......
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: Vamps on 15 October 2013, 19:47:16
I spent mine doing basic training at Catterick Garrison. They don't give you time off to celebrate.

Is that a prison?...... ;D ;D ;)
Sort of......

In those day's yes.................. ;) ;)
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: cnj on 16 October 2013, 05:45:12
could have been Colchester !
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: belldarr on 16 October 2013, 06:30:08
I spent my 18th birthday peeling piggin spuds in the cookhouse of the sergeants mess at Raf Halton  ::)

Walking to class first thing ............... end of January with lots of snow on the ground ................. snowball fight starts and I get one in the head ............. so I make myself a nice big one and throw, miss badly ............. well actually miss very badly because it flies over said targets head ................ travels another 50 yards or so and tw*ts the station commander who was taking a parade on the square  in the head  :o :'( :'(

He didn't see the funny side  ::)

I have been to a few functions there - great food :)
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: MR MISTER on 16 October 2013, 07:38:01
could have been Colchester !
Done that. MCTC was proper in those days.
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: Shackeng on 16 October 2013, 09:53:16
I spent my 18th birthday peeling piggin spuds in the cookhouse of the sergeants mess at Raf Halton  ::)

Walking to class first thing ............... end of January with lots of snow on the ground ................. snowball fight starts and I get one in the head ............. so I make myself a nice big one and throw, miss badly ............. well actually miss very badly because it flies over said targets head ................ travels another 50 yards or so and tw*ts the station commander who was taking a parade on the square  in the head  :o :'( :'(

He didn't see the funny side  ::)

Part of a chef's training. ::) ::) ::) (Surely it wasn't jankers? ;D ;D ;D)
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: tigers_gonads on 16 October 2013, 10:44:00
I spent my 18th birthday peeling piggin spuds in the cookhouse of the sergeants mess at Raf Halton  ::)

Walking to class first thing ............... end of January with lots of snow on the ground ................. snowball fight starts and I get one in the head ............. so I make myself a nice big one and throw, miss badly ............. well actually miss very badly because it flies over said targets head ................ travels another 50 yards or so and tw*ts the station commander who was taking a parade on the square  in the head  :o :'( :'(

He didn't see the funny side  ::)

Part of a chef's training. ::) ::) ::) (Surely it wasn't jankers? ;D ;D ;D)



What jankers ?    Moi  ::) ;D

Lets put it this way, Section 69 was my middle name at times  :-X ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: Entwood on 16 October 2013, 10:52:18
I spent my 18th birthday peeling piggin spuds in the cookhouse of the sergeants mess at Raf Halton  ::)

Walking to class first thing ............... end of January with lots of snow on the ground ................. snowball fight starts and I get one in the head ............. so I make myself a nice big one and throw, miss badly ............. well actually miss very badly because it flies over said targets head ................ travels another 50 yards or so and tw*ts the station commander who was taking a parade on the square  in the head  :o :'( :'(

He didn't see the funny side  ::)

Part of a chef's training. ::) ::) ::) (Surely it wasn't jankers? ;D ;D ;D)



What jankers ?    Moi  ::) ;D

Lets put it this way, Section 69 was my middle name at times  :-X ;D ;D ;D ;D

An absolutely wonderful piece of prose, whoever drafted that was a genius ...   :) I wish I had £1 for every time I wrote it on a 252 .. :)
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: tigers_gonads on 16 October 2013, 11:05:56
I spent my 18th birthday peeling piggin spuds in the cookhouse of the sergeants mess at Raf Halton  ::)

Walking to class first thing ............... end of January with lots of snow on the ground ................. snowball fight starts and I get one in the head ............. so I make myself a nice big one and throw, miss badly ............. well actually miss very badly because it flies over said targets head ................ travels another 50 yards or so and tw*ts the station commander who was taking a parade on the square  in the head  :o :'( :'(

He didn't see the funny side  ::)

Part of a chef's training. ::) ::) ::) (Surely it wasn't jankers? ;D ;D ;D)



What jankers ?    Moi  ::) ;D

Lets put it this way, Section 69 was my middle name at times  :-X ;D ;D ;D ;D

An absolutely wonderful piece of prose, whoever drafted that was a genius ...   :) I wish I had £1 for every time I wrote it on a 252 .. :)


You would have been able to buy your omega with pound coins if you had known me in those days  ;D
By the end our my sausage land tour, I think admin was having them printed with my service number already on  ;D ;D ;D
With me, I think the phrase  "respect the person, not the rank" fitted me perfectly  ;)
Good job I could do my job well or thinking back, I don't think i'd have lasted the full term.

Best days of my life    :)
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: Entwood on 16 October 2013, 11:15:06
I spent my 18th birthday peeling piggin spuds in the cookhouse of the sergeants mess at Raf Halton  ::)

Walking to class first thing ............... end of January with lots of snow on the ground ................. snowball fight starts and I get one in the head ............. so I make myself a nice big one and throw, miss badly ............. well actually miss very badly because it flies over said targets head ................ travels another 50 yards or so and tw*ts the station commander who was taking a parade on the square  in the head  :o :'( :'(

He didn't see the funny side  ::)

Part of a chef's training. ::) ::) ::) (Surely it wasn't jankers? ;D ;D ;D)



What jankers ?    Moi  ::) ;D

Lets put it this way, Section 69 was my middle name at times  :-X ;D ;D ;D ;D

An absolutely wonderful piece of prose, whoever drafted that was a genius ...   :) I wish I had £1 for every time I wrote it on a 252 .. :)


You would have been able to buy your omega with pound coins if you had known me in those days  ;D
By the end our my sausage land tour, I think admin was having them printed with my service number already on  ;D ;D ;D
With me, I think the phrase  "respect the person, not the rank" fitted me perfectly  ;)
Good job I could do my job well or thinking back, I don't think i'd have lasted the full term.

Best days of my life    :)

Yup .. best 38 years of mine .. :)
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: Shackeng on 16 October 2013, 11:24:11
I spent my 18th birthday peeling piggin spuds in the cookhouse of the sergeants mess at Raf Halton  ::)

Walking to class first thing ............... end of January with lots of snow on the ground ................. snowball fight starts and I get one in the head ............. so I make myself a nice big one and throw, miss badly ............. well actually miss very badly because it flies over said targets head ................ travels another 50 yards or so and tw*ts the station commander who was taking a parade on the square  in the head  :o :'( :'(

He didn't see the funny side  ::)

Part of a chef's training. ::) ::) ::) (Surely it wasn't jankers? ;D ;D ;D)



What jankers ?    Moi  ::) ;D

Lets put it this way, Section 69 was my middle name at times  :-X ;D ;D ;D ;D

IIRC "Conduct prejudicial to good order and discipline." Mind you it was a long time ago! ::)
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: tigers_gonads on 16 October 2013, 11:30:02
I spent my 18th birthday peeling piggin spuds in the cookhouse of the sergeants mess at Raf Halton  ::)

Walking to class first thing ............... end of January with lots of snow on the ground ................. snowball fight starts and I get one in the head ............. so I make myself a nice big one and throw, miss badly ............. well actually miss very badly because it flies over said targets head ................ travels another 50 yards or so and tw*ts the station commander who was taking a parade on the square  in the head  :o :'( :'(

He didn't see the funny side  ::)

Part of a chef's training. ::) ::) ::) (Surely it wasn't jankers? ;D ;D ;D)



What jankers ?    Moi  ::) ;D

Lets put it this way, Section 69 was my middle name at times  :-X ;D ;D ;D ;D

IIRC "Conduct prejudicial to good order and discipline." Mind you it was a long time ago! ::)


aka Bringing the Royal Air Force into disrepute  :)
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: Entwood on 16 October 2013, 11:34:12
Just to refresh the mind ... Air Force Act 1955 Section 69

69 Conduct to prejudice of air-force discipline.

Any person subject to air-force law who is guilty, whether by any act or omission or otherwise, of conduct to the prejudice of good order and air-force discipline shall, on conviction by court-martial, be liable to imprisonment for a term not exceeding two years or any less punishment provided by this Act.


The catch-all of catch-alls .. :)
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: tigers_gonads on 16 October 2013, 11:38:41
Just to refresh the mind ... Air Force Act 1955 Section 69

69 Conduct to prejudice of air-force discipline.

Any person subject to air-force law who is guilty, whether by any act or omission or otherwise, of conduct to the prejudice of good order and air-force discipline shall, on conviction by court-martial, be liable to imprisonment for a term not exceeding two years or any less punishment provided by this Act.


The catch-all of catch-alls .. :)


That brings back some memories  ::)
 
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: albitz on 16 October 2013, 11:58:10
could have been Colchester !
Done that. MCTC was proper in those days.

Evidently,they didn't administer anywhere near enough corrective training in your case. ::)
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: Shackeng on 16 October 2013, 12:54:51
Just to refresh the mind ... Air Force Act 1955 Section 69

69 Conduct to prejudice of air-force discipline.

Any person subject to air-force law who is guilty, whether by any act or omission or otherwise, of conduct to the prejudice of good order and air-force discipline shall, on conviction by court-martial, be liable to imprisonment for a term not exceeding two years or any less punishment provided by this Act.


The catch-all of catch-alls .. :)

Now if we could only write one similar under civil law............... :-X
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: MR MISTER on 16 October 2013, 13:32:55
could have been Colchester !
Done that. MCTC was proper in those days.

Evidently,they didn't administer anywhere near enough corrective training in your case. ::)
Coming out of there was the only time in my life that I possessed a six pack (not thr type you drink). It was fickin brutal. ;D
And d'yer know what? Looking back, I enjoyed it, the whole army experience. But that's the thing isn't it, I should have tried to enjoy it more while I was actually doing it. Never mind, eh?
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: albitz on 16 October 2013, 13:38:27
Well,if you ever want to come down Colchester way and revisit your misspent youth just let me know Steve. :y







I will arrange to be out of the country. ;D
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: MR MISTER on 16 October 2013, 13:41:18
Well,if you ever want to come down Colchester way and revisit your misspent youth just let me know Steve. :y







I will arrange to be out of the country. ;D
I had a look on streetview last week. The robin hood is still there, and the scheregate hotel, but the rest of it looks totally unfamiliar.  :(
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: albitz on 16 October 2013, 13:44:45
Iirc the Robin Hood is now a pizza restaurant. :-\
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: MR MISTER on 16 October 2013, 13:58:07
Iirc the Robin Hood is now a pizza restaurant. :-\
Yes, so google tells me. I just looked at streetview and saw the out side. Forgot how narrow those streets were.
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: albitz on 16 October 2013, 14:06:02
Imo Colchester is a shitehouse.I rarely go near the place if I can help it. ;)
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: MR MISTER on 16 October 2013, 14:13:35
Imo Colchester is a shitehouse.I rarely go near the place if I can help it. ;)
Always was, but you don't care when you're young.
Title: Re: He takes after his old man ...............
Post by: albitz on 16 October 2013, 15:03:08
True. :y