Well, this explains a lot...
For you Chemistry Buffs...
A new addition to Chemistry's Periodic Table
Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to
science. The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant
neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it
an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are
surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since
Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected,
because it impedes every action with which it comes into contact.
A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally
take less than a second to take from four days to four years to
complete.Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2-6 years; it does not
decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the
assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.
In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each
reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.
This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that
Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This
hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.
When catalyzed with money,Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element
that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many
peons but twice as many morons.
There is currently a theory that morons can gain a devious control over peons causing
them to attempt to choose up sides in what theoretically could be called an electorium.
Unfortunately, it is a known fact that that in any electorium the side with the lowest class
of morons would attempt to put the worst of their lot in an elevated position. Often
those of dubious character are referred to as democratiums. Lets hope this is just a theory!
We should find out by the first Monday after the first Tuesday in November of this year..
DC
Author
Topic: A new Element for the periodic table! (Read 1091 times)