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[dbug]

Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked,
'How old was your husband?'
'98,' she replied, 'Two years older than me'
'So you're 96,' the undertaker commented.
She responded , 'Hardly worth going home, is it?

Reporter interviewing a 104-year-old woman:
'And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?' the reporter asked.
She simply replied, 'No peer pressure.'

The nice thing about being senile is you can hide your own Easter eggs.

I've sure gotten old! I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement, new knees, fought prostate cancer and diabetes
I'm half blind.
Can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine,
Take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts.
Have bouts with dementia ..
Have poor circulation;
Hardly feel my hands and feet anymore.
Can't remember if I'm 89 or 98.
Have lost all my friends.. But, thank God, I still have my driver's license..

I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so I got my doctor's permission to Join a fitness club and start exercising.
I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors.
I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But, by the time I got my leotards on, the class was over.

My memory's not as sharp as it used to be.. Also, my memory's not as sharp as it used to be.

Know how to prevent sagging? Just eat till the wrinkles fill out.

It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffee maker.

[waspy]

Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked,
'How old was your husband?'
'98,' she replied, 'Two years older than me'
'So you're 96,' the undertaker commented.
She responded , 'Hardly worth going home, is it? 

 

[waspy]

I've sure gotten old! I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement, new knees, fought prostate cancer and diabetes
I'm half blind.
Can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine,
Take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts.
Have bouts with dementia ..
Have poor circulation;
Hardly feel my hands and feet anymore.
Can't remember if I'm 89 or 98.
Have lost all my friends.. But, thank God, I still have my driver's license.. 

Followed quite a few of these old buggers

[dbug]

I've sure gotten old! I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement, new knees, fought prostate cancer and diabetes
I'm half blind.
Can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine,
Take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts.
Have bouts with dementia ..
Have poor circulation;
Hardly feel my hands and feet anymore.
Can't remember if I'm 89 or 98.
Have lost all my friends.. But, thank God, I still have my driver's license.. 

Followed quite a few of these old buggers

They are a pain in the rse or what?

[Radiomarko]

... I still have my driver's license..

I've been hit and car written off by one as well.   :-/

[Lizzie_Zoom]

Yes it is hard getting old(er)!!

[Elite Pete]

I've sure gotten old! I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement, new knees, fought prostate cancer and diabetes
I'm half blind.
Can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine,
Take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts.
Have bouts with dementia ..
Have poor circulation;
Hardly feel my hands and feet anymore.
Can't remember if I'm 89 or 98.
Have lost all my friends.. But, thank God, I still have my driver's license.. 

Followed quite a few of these old buggers

They are a pain in the rse or what?

It comes to us all sooner or later, some sooner than others

[Kevin Wood]

I've sure gotten old! I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement, new knees, fought prostate cancer and diabetes
I'm half blind.
Can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine,
Take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts.
Have bouts with dementia ..
Have poor circulation;
Hardly feel my hands and feet anymore.
Can't remember if I'm 89 or 98.
Have lost all my friends.. But, thank God, I still have my driver's license.. 

Followed quite a few of these old buggers

They are a pain in the rse or what?

It comes to us all sooner or later, some sooner than others

Can't accuse my Grandad of that, RIP.

The older he got the faster he went. Even downgrading him to a 1.4 Volvo 340 didn't stop him. He still drove everywhere at 90+. 

He had the good sense to hang up his driving gloves in the end but he was nearly 90 and couldn't see too well when he finally did. 

Kevin

[Dishevelled Den]

Yes it is hard getting old(er)!!

I'm afraid I have to disagree with you Ms Zoom

[Lizzie_Zoom]

Yes it is hard getting old(er)!!

I'm afraid I have to disagree with you Ms Zoom

Well there is good stuff for men who suffer that Zulu!!