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[Varche]

My therapist told me that a great way to let go of your anger is to write letters to people you hate and then burn them.
I did that and I feel much better but I am wondering do I keep the letters.?

[Varche]

I'm worried something might be wrong with my testicles.
One seems bigger than the others.

[ronnyd]

I'm worried something might be wrong with my testicles.
One seems bigger than the others.

You're nuts. 

[Varche]

A newly wed couple on their honeymoon night are in the bedroom getting undressed when she says.

"Darling, now that we are married, I have a little confession to make, I was a hooker before we met, are you OK with that"

He replies "Of course I am darling, we hadn't met then and to be honest it turns me on,so tell me more

She says "Well, my name used to be Brian and I played for St. Helens

[Varche]

A mother takes her four year old daughter into the bank and the little girl goes up to the counter and says " as I now have a job I would like to open a bank account" the manager replies oh what sort of a job do you have?" The little girl replies " I have a job on a building site" the mother explains that they have builders working on land at the bottom of their garden and the builders have taken a shine to her daughter and let her turn the hose on and off and as she has been so helpful have given her a proper pay packet. " well that's wonderful says the bank manager it's so good to work hard and receive a pay packet, are you working next week?" " yes says the little girl if those *word censored* from Jewson deliver the oppsing bricks on time

[Raeturbo]

🤣 how true,  don’t take long to learn the basics of the building trade🤣🤣

[STEMO]

A newly wed couple on their honeymoon night are in the bedroom getting undressed when she says.

"Darling, now that we are married, I have a little confession to make, I was a hooker before we met, are you OK with that"

He replies "Of course I am darling, we hadn't met then and to be honest it turns me on,so tell me more

She says "Well, my name used to be Brian and I played for St. Helens

[Varche]

One for Rangie

It's only my second day in prison, and I've already been brutally bummed in the showers three times.

I'm starting to think maybe I'm not cut out to be a guard

[Varche]

People say that I'm a bad person.... but I reckon they're just jealous that they can't kick pigeons as far as I can.

[Varche]

A mate of mine believes that the Earth is flat. I challenged him to prove it by walking off the edge...

He eventually came around.

[Sir Tigger KC]

Apparently Trump is building a golf course in Iran.  He's done six holes already.

[Varche]

Paddy walks into a bar and orders 7 Tequilas and a Guinness.
The barman pours the 7 Tequilas and goes to get the Guinness.

When he comes back he notices that Paddy has drunk all the shots.
You drank those fast he says.

"You'd drink them fast too if you knew what I knew".
"Oh yeah" he says. "What do you know?"

"I've only got 2 Euros".

[Migv6 le Frog Fan]

Non alcoholic beer is like a vibrator with no batteries.
It fills you up nicely, but you dont get the buzz.

[JasonH]

Stop buying plastic skeletons for Halloween, they're terrible for the environment.

Locally sourced, all natural skeletons are much more environmentally friendly.

They take a bit of prep work, but so worth it.

[Migv6 le Frog Fan]

The Grand old Duke of York.
He gave 12 million quid.
To a Woman he had never met
For something he never did.