Just a quick update.
Got home on Friday, the wife and i had been talking about how to handle the situation and what message we wanted to get across to him Vs what his side of the situation was.
After a fairly consructive discussion with him doing a lot of the talking he has agreed that he needs to knuckle down and sort his life out, he has applied to the army 
and is waiting his date for his first assessment, when i asked him why he was doing this he came back with the fact that he feels it will give him direction, discipline and opportunities that civvy life isn't giving him currently.
My wife was really good, she refused to let him stay in the house overnight during the week, he was welcome in during the day for a chat, change of clothes etc. Strangely enough by being this harsh on him he opened up a bit and talked like a 'adult' to her about what he wanted to do and shared his concerns. Banning him from the house did seem harsh, but we knew where he was on a nighttime and what he didn't realise was if there was any risk of him not having somewhere safe to sleep my wife would have told him to come home.
up until now he has only seen a snapshot of his friends lifestyle, and that's the bit where they have no commitment to work, by being with them for more than a few hours he started to realise that without money he can do very little, and his anticipated late nights out down the pub and long lie ins the following morning were in fact a non starter.
So we have peace and happiness in the house again, he apologised for his attitude and behaviour, i hope that this is the start of a better relationship with him
cheers for the tips and support guys, one or two of you offered soome great ideas 
and they were things that i hadn't considered.
Thats excellent news and I am glad you aret talking to him about what it means to join the army. Take it from me its no picnic right now but if you can handle the lifestyle the friends and the experiences are second to none. Sure I have just been in Basra for 3 months getting attacked by rockets but the banter and your mates get you through.
I gave up a programming job in France, a house just outside Paris and a slot on a semi pro rugby league team to join the army and I do not regret it at all!
That said it isn't everybody's cup of tea and a word of advice - dont take anything the recruiters tell you as gospel. I'm not saying they sell porkies but I have had several of my soldiers come through who reckon they were told one thing by the recruiters and then reality hits and its another thing completely.
If you need any advice, hints and tips, gosip, etc dont hesitate to give me a shout. It can be very daunting for parents even more so than for the soldier himself!
In Arduis Fidelis!
Gaffers
Author
Topic: families.....who rather needs them (Read 7528 times)